18 Hilarious White Elephant Gifts to Take to Your Office Party
The holidays mean lots of office holiday parties. And office holiday parties usually mean you’ll have to participate in a white elephant gift exchange. If you’re not familiar with a white elephant exchange, it goes like this: everyone brings a wrapped gift, players draw names, then the first person selects a gift. They open it, and the players after that can choose to either pick a wrapped gift to open, or steal a gift from someone else. If your gift gets stolen, you can steal someone else’s or pick a new wrapped gift. This continues until someone refuses to steal or swap. Usually, white elephant gifts are simple and kind of boring. Something generic that everyone would like. But that’s no fun at all. So this season, pick something off this list to take to your white elephant gift exchange. Trust us, the looks on people’s faces will be worth it.
White elephant gifts don’t have to be useful. But they can be, in a weird “didn’t know I needed this but it’s amazing” sort of way.
Who DOESN’T want a hot dog and bun toaster? Honestly.
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Horrifying but amazing: perfect white elephant gift description.
We’ve written about the dad bag before, and it’s finally hit the market. This one will be stolen constantly.
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Hidden dicks are everywhere.
This calendar is like a very inappropriate Where’s Waldo? but with dicks.
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Kill time in the john working on your short game.
Bring the Potty Putter to your white elephant, and watch people try to steal it away from one another all night.
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Wine accessories for the perverted people at the party.
Who doesn’t want a NSFW set of wine stoppers and corkscrews?
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Now with balls!
This cookbook of recipes for cock with balls is hilarious AND useful.
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Because everyone will get lit at least once this holiday season.
Holiday can koozies are something pretty much everyone needs.
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We’re not sure anyone will want to steal this one and out themselves.
We’re sure a few other employees will know just who should end up with this honest mug.
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For the co-worker who comes back from every vacation with 127 pictures of her cat in a bathing suit.
Just be prepared: whoever gets this unique craft book will likely have a lot of cat hair gifts for everyone next year.
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For the guy who falls asleep at every single morning meeting.
This nap sack will allow anyone to nap anywhere, totally incognito!
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Sure, it seems like a lovely sentiment…
Just make sure whoever gets this mug remembers to take a drink of coffee when the boss is walking away.
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For the underachiever who needs a lot of encouragement.
Some of these are pretty decent accomplishments, and who doesn’t love stickers? They’re not just for kids, you know.
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A well-pooped co-worker is a kinder, gentler co-worker.
It might seen weird to give a poop stool to a co-worker, but you know some of them are full of shit and can REALLY use it.
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Judging by how some office holiday parties end up, this will be the hottest gift of the exchange.
The cookbook for the co-worker who had a few too many, made a complete ass of themselves, but will probably still want breakfast the next morning.
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Think about the last thing you washed during your last shower, and the first thing you wash during your next shower.
Honestly, everyone should have butt soap and face soap. This is a brilliant gift.
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Good white elephant gifts are the ones you’d want for yourself.
The key is to make sure the co-worker with the awesome backyard pool gets this gift, so you can use it next summer.
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Coloring is a great stress reliever!
So is telling that asshole in accounting to go fuck themselves. Within the lines, of course.
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And finally, bring the gift you really want to bring, the one that shows how much you care.
A jar of nothing, because honestly, that’s exactly what some of your asshole co-workers deserve.
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Which of these white elephant gifts would you be stoked to bring to your holiday party? Which one would you steal for yourself? Tell us in the comments!