Screw Your Marital Bliss, Weddings Are Getting Way Too Expensive
Sure there are some people who have an amazing destination wedding at a place you actually want to visit. This wedding may double as a really cool vacation for you. And there are others who are low key and just throw a fabulous, intimate party that makes you believe in love again. Everyone else basically sucks.
American Express surveyed 1500 Americans and found out that on average they were spending $592 per wedding, up 10% from last year and up 75% in two years. From Market Watch:
That includes the pre-wedding party, transportation, hotel, clothing, accessories, and personal grooming â€“ but excludes the cost of gifts. â€œAmericans are getting more comfortable with having an expensive wedding, which does put the onus on guests to spend more too,â€ says David Rabkin, senior vice president of consumer lending at American Express.
This excludes the cost of a gift! And we all know how important the gift is. I’ve read several pieces written by disgruntled couples disappointed in the gifts their guests chose. Oy, vey.
The problem is, good friends usually expect you to be at their wedding. If you are just a guest, you are getting off pretty easy; being in the wedding party is an even larger expense. If you ask me, people have just gone ape-shit bananas when it comes to planning their weddings. Often, they are spending so much that comparably they feel like asking guests to come out of pocket to the tune of $500 or more seems like no big deal. Or worse – what their wedding is costing their guests doesn’t even cross their mind.
But on the flip side – as a potential guest that potentially can’t afford to attend all the weddings you are invited to – you must remember that a wedding invitation is just that – an invitation. It’s not a subpoena. If you really can’t afford to attend a friend’s wedding or simply don’t want to be put out hundreds of dollars to go, this would be a really good time for an exercise in boundaries. You are allowed to decline.
So if your good friend can’t understand why you don’t want to fly to Montana and stay in a hotel in the middle of nowhere so she can have a wedding that Nana, who won’t get on a plane, can attend – screw her. If your friendship can’t survive an RSVP – who needs a friend like that anyway?