Uber Starts Running Errands And Changes The Lives Of Parents

In a move that will make even the most hardened and independent of us get a case of the vapors, Uber CEO Travis Kalanick has announced that his car-on-demand company is looking to broaden its scope of services into a few different areas, one of which would be running errands for customers. Uber could go to the pharmacy, for example, or the corner store. Consider my panties dropped.

For the past year or so, Uber, which has made itself extremely popular for its app that allows users to get a taxi or limousine within minutes, has been experimenting with delivery services. Remember last year, when they delivered kittens on National Cat Day (AKA the Day of Yes)? Well, it turns out they have also been delivering food (in Los Angeles), flowers on Valentine’s Day, and ice cream for any time at my house. Apparently those experiments have gone so well that Kalanick says in an article on CNN Money:

 “…Imagine all the things you get at a corner store…FedEx isn’t going to your nearest pharmacy and delivering something to you in five minutes.”

No, they are not, but Uber might be in the not too distant future.

Can you even begin to imagine all of the possibilities, here? Picture it: you’re nine months pregnant, and the only thing in the world that you want is a bag of Cool Ranch Doritos. Instead of having to haul your huge ass out the door or ask your partner who is way over your b.s. at this point to do it for you, you can ask Uber. Because Uber won’t say no. Uber won’t roll their eyes and say they’re tired and they just got back from the store. Uber won’t act like a martyr or ask if you really think Doritos are good for the baby. No, Uber will just do it and be happy you asked.

Or for those of us with older kids, what about telling Uber to go get snacks? “What kind of snacks? Any kind. If it’s a snack food that will fit inside a child’s mouth then get it.” That’s time that you could spend cleaning the house or playing Farmville…you know, whatever floats your boat. You’re snack mom at school today? No problem. The Uber guy will be there soon with your nut-free snack options. The kids have been a nightmare and you just can’t deal with the supermarket today? Get yourself a big ol’ dose of Uber.

Or, how about after the baby arrives, and you realize during a late-night feeding that you are unexpectedly low on diapers? Just lay down on the floor and rest your eyes for a few minutes till the Uber fairy appears at your door.

I’m no genius, but I have the feeling Uber is going to be delivering a whole lot of diapers, tampons, and condoms.

(photo: PathDoc / Shutterstock)