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Babies Need Pregnant Dolls To Play Babies With – And These Raging Doll Reviewers Agree With Me

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Pregnant DollAs much as I want all the young ladies to wait until they have a million dollars in the bank and have backpacked across Europe and done everything else fun and awesome they can do before having babies, I am totally for pregnant dolls. Why? Because they are awesome and creepy, that’s why! And I don’t think pregnant dolls, and no, not Barbie, because I don’t think Barbie has ever been pregnant (she is too busy being president) but Barbie’s friends like Midge and these kick-off Barbies don’t encourage young girls to magically want to get pregnant at age 10. If anything, seeing their mommies or other relatives pregnant encourage that. Dolls are just dolls and we need pregnant dolls to let our babies play babies with, especially when they are awesome like our friend Judith here who has some creepy spring-loaded tummy that makes her lose all of her baby weight with the push of a button. Judith, via Boing Boing:

[youtube_iframe id=”WfvqL-u18Gs”]

According to the video, there was actually a twins version! I have a pregnant Midge somewhere, and now she is being sold for a bunch of spacebux on the Internet, so I should probably find her, but when researching Midge I came across some amazing product reviews for her:

I am a very old fashioned conservative Mother who never even bought her daughter a Bratz doll. Some of the dolls out there look like hookers. This doll is a wonderful way to show children where babies come from. Little girls love babies, and are fascinated about being “little Mommys” to their play baby dolls & perhaps new baby brothers or sisters. It doesn’t mean they are going to remember this Barbie when they are 14 yrs old and wake up one morning and declare “I think it’s time to have a baby like Barbie did when i was 6 years old”. GET A CLUE PEOPLE!!! I bought this for my little girl when I was expecting a baby. I also bought her baby dolls, diaper bags and play bottles. None of which made her want to become a Mother now that she is almost 13 years old. I just showed her this photo and her reaction was “OH YEAH!!! I remember that!!! I was obsessed with playing with the little baby!!!” Exactly. The baby doesn’t come out of the Barbie’s vagina people.

 

GET A CLUE PEOPLE!!!! The baby doesn’t come out of Barbie’s vagina people – and I sorta love “vagina people.” And another totally passionate review:

WHY WOULD ANY LITTLE GIRL WANT TO BECOME A REAL MOTHER! TELL ME! HOW MANY LITTLE GIRLS DO YOU KNOW OF WOULD WANT THAT? IF THEY DID DREAM OF BECOMING MOTHERS – WHICH IS NOT ONLY CUTE, BUT RATHER NURTURING, AND INNOCENT AS WELL – THEY’D BUY PLASTIC TOY BABIES! DUH! I DID! AND NOTHING BAD HAPPENED TO ME. I THINK MIDGE IS A BETTER ROLE MODEL THAN BARBIE ANYDAY. THAT BLONDE SLUT IS NOTHING BUT AN AIRHEAD WHO BECOMES OBSESSED WITH FASHION AND BOYS. LOOK AT MY SCENE! SAME GOES FOR BRATZ. MIDGE IS DECENT, MARRIED MOTHER, WHO WORRIES ABOUT MAINTAINING A FAMILY! BRATZ AND BARBIE HAVE SEDUCED GIRLS INTO WANTING TO BECOME HOOCHIE-MAMAS. FACE THE FACTS, PEOPLE! MIDGE WILL ONLY INSPIRE GIRLS TO DREAM OF BEING DECENT MOTHERS! THERE! MIDGE IS BETTER!

 

And this review, which I think is an excellent idea and we should all contact Mattel right away:

Maybe the next logical follow-up would be to have breastfeeding Barbie, complete with nursing bras!

 

I love pregnant dolls, and I would have no issue with my daughter playing with one. Dolls don’t get women pregnant, penises get women pregnant!

(Image: You Tube)