having a baby
Two Pujas Does Not Equal A Happy Pregnant Woman
I hope everyone else had a wonderful holiday because I was majorly irritated by another overbearing aunty in my life â€“ my mother-in-law. I mentioned before that my mom would like to host a puja for me to bless me in preparation for the baby. It needs to happen in the fifth, seventh or ninth month of pregnancy. I ruled the fifth month (my current month) out because itâ€™s too soon after the holidays and the baby is still jinxable this early on! I know, I guess Iâ€™m a little superstitious myself. I also ruled out the last month because I really donâ€™t want to deal with other visitors and prefer privacy, as I get closer to delivery.
That leaves the seventh month, which also happens to be the month my husband and I are traveling to NY for one last baby-free hurrah with my big city friends, and also when my dad has a milestone birthday. My mom and I discussed that it made most sense to invite the aunties over for the puja earlier in the day and then have a birthday party for my dad later in the evening.
A couple weeks ago my husband told me my mother-in-law expressed some interest in visiting us in the new year. She has mobility issues and after falling down and undergoing surgery last year, sheâ€™s been unable to travel long distances. But the trip from her home in the south to California where we live is doable. I told him it probably made sense for her to attend the puja and birthday party, so she could be there to bless me as well. Inwardly I cringe a little at the thought of her visiting â€“ the last time she and my father-in-law came to visit things did not end well.
(UGH just picture two extroverts dealing with an introverted daughter-in-law. If I get up to go to the bathroom, itâ€™s â€œWhereâ€™s Diya? Why did she leave? Why isnâ€™t she spending time with us? We came here to see HER!â€)
Anyway, my second day into my Christmas holiday with the in-laws, I wake up from a nap and this happens:
MIL: We do a seventh-month puja too, so you will have to come here.
Husband: Remember what I said mom? Weâ€™re also doing a birthday party for her dad.
MIL: Just like you do it for your family, this is what I do and you will come here.
Me: Weâ€™ll have to talk about it.
MIL: Iâ€™ll talk to your mother about it.
Me: Actually itâ€™s me you need to talk to. OK I didnâ€™t actually say this but I was thinking it!