Your New Favorite Twitter Account Belongs To Kim And Kanye’s Unborn Fetus
Please tell me that you guys caught the most amazing interview ever in the history of all time in the entire world ever â„¢ which was the hilariously awesome interview that Kanye West gave to the New York Times? It’s three days old and I’m still quoting it whenever possible/also planning on getting some of this shit cross-stitched onto pillows. Highlights!
But has that instinct led you astray? Like the Taylor Swift interruption at the MTV Video Music Awards, things like that.
Itâ€™s only led me to complete awesomeness at all times. Itâ€™s only led me to awesome truth and awesomeness. Beauty, truth, awesomeness. Thatâ€™s all it is.
You look at your outfits from five or seven years ago, and itâ€™s like â€”
Yeah, kill self. Thatâ€™s all I have to say. Kill self.
It’s pretty much the best thing ever. All other things in your life like your children and cake and kittens and cashmere sweaters can basically eff the eff off because of this Kanye interview. Â You don’t even need TV or books anymore. But one of the most magically delicious parts of the interview are when Kanye is questioned about his upcoming realityspawnâ„¢ with Kim Kardashian and he says:
Have you ever felt as fiercely protective over anything as you are feeling now about those things?
I donâ€™t want to explain too much into what my thoughts on, you know, fatherhood are, because Iâ€™ve not fully developed those thoughts yet. I donâ€™t have a kid yet.
You havenâ€™t experienced it yet.
Yeah. Well, I just donâ€™t want to talk to America about my family. Like, this is my baby. This isnâ€™t Americaâ€™s baby.
Hear that MERICUH’ this is not YOUR baby this is KANYE’S baby so go get your own damn baby but if you don’t feel like getting your own baby you can always follow America’sBaby1 on Twitter:
The best part is, America’sBaby follows both Kanye and Kim and they do not follow America’sBaby back, which proves both Kim and Kanye have zero sense of humor, are neglectful parents to this Twitter parody account and/or planning on getting their actual baby its own Twitter account so it can tweet at us from its magical Tom Ford designed fur and diamond encrusted slumbering chamber.