9 Thoughts Every Woman Has While Bra Shopping After Kids
Most women will agree that bra shopping is exactly like swimsuit shopping in that it’s the worst thing ever. Bra shopping after you’ve been pregnant, had kids, possibly breastfeed, and watched your boobs deflate is even more difficult. Not only does everything about your body shape feel completely foreign to you, but you’re also not exactly the lean, perky-breasted 20-year-old most bra designers seem to have in mind when brainstorming new torture devices.
If you struggle to find a bra that fits you correctly, you are not alone. In fact, I’m pretty sure they should make support groups just for bra shopping. Here are nine thoughts every woman has while shopping for new bras after having kids:
1. I wear what size?!
You’re going to want to get measured before you shop, and you might be surprised to find things have…shifted a bit. Basically you have new boobs and everything you used to know is a lie.
2. Oh God, why are there so many options?
You told the sitter you were going to pop in to the store ‘real quick’ after an appointment, but your quick trip to the store is actually going to take several hours. It might possibly take longer than buying a car. Settle in.
3. What’s a convertible, stretch, t-shirt, insta-cleavage, relaxed, sexy, lift-tacular, water balloon bra?
Considering bra styles change every 14 seconds, you’re in for a vocabulary lesson if you’ve been out of the lingerie game for a while. Don’t worry: they’re all still basically uncomfortable, overpriced, useless, and made for a teenager.
4. Oh, great! This fitting room has a 360-degree mirror!
I can’t wait to see my lopsided breasticles from so many new and exciting angles!