Let’s All Be Jealous Of This Woman Who Gave Birth An Hour After Learning She’s Pregnant

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katie kropas surprise pregnancyLess than an hour – less than one hour – after arriving the hospital and discovering she was pregnant with a full-term baby, a Massachusetts woman gave birth to her firstborn daughter. I’m not sure whether to feel sorry for this woman, or be incredibly, wildly jealous. No, actually, I am sure. It’s jealousy. Definitely jealousy.

NECN reports that 23-year-old Katie Kropas arrived at South Shore Hospital with some unpleasant stomach pains, and didn’t know what to think when doctors told her their cause: a bouncing baby girl who was soon to make her appearance. Well, actually, I assume what she thought was, “I’m in excruciating discomfort, why are these horrible doctors pranking me?!”

Kropas laughingly compares herself to the people on I Didn’t Know I Was Pregnant – no one ever thinks that would happen to them, but sure enough, it happened to her. With a regular period all through her pregnancy, and being on a regular birth control regimen, really, why would she have had reason to keep an eye peeled for pregnancy symptoms? She never suffered from morning sickness (which definitely tips my needle farther toward ‘Jealous’), her weight gain matched up neatly with the weight gain that just about everyone packs on during the holidays, and her swollen ankles were attributable to the fifty-hour work weeks she spent on her feet at her catering job.

It sounds like Kropas, her long-term boyfriend, and the newly-minted grandparents are excited about the new baby, and they are also being remarkably chill about the whole thing – far chiller than I can imagine being upon getting handed a surprise ten pound baby that I’d unwittingly manufactured in my tummy. (Did I mention this kid was ten pounds? TEN. POUNDS.) For me, a full nine months of pregnancy was still not enough time to feel like I had everything under control and ready to bring the babies home to. Multiple classes about the birth process, breastfeeding, and how to keep newborns alive were not enough to prepare me for feeling like a capable adult human being.

But then again, it would have been nice not to spend three trimesters worrying that every twinge or cramp was a potential pregnancy-ending threat, instead of chalking it up to a need to fart. It would have been thrilling to not spend the first three months horking into my office wastebasket every time someone carried a strongly-scented lunch past my door. And it would have been amazing not to spend the full span dreading the horrifying miracle of childbirth (or of C-section). Realistically, of course, it took a lot of science for me to be pregnant and there’s no way I wouldn’t have know that it worked (especially since by the end I was packing a combined 13 total pounds of baby human and was about one centimeter away from having to wear a circus tent instead of pants). But still, it’s a nice thought.

I wish Kropas and her adorable new addition all the best, even through my burning envy. At least, I think that’s envy I’m feeling, but now I’m afraid to speculate what medical investigation might turn up.

(Image: NECN)