STFU Parents: Performing Pregnancy: Have You Grown a Baby Today?

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1. Story Hour: Productivity Edition


Wow, thanks for the rundown, D! You did all that in a single afternoon AND still had time to work on making the baby? Color me impressed. I thought pregnant women just quietly rocked themselves in a dark room for nine months, but it turns out they can make Rice Krispy treats, use Swiffer mops, clean toilets, and fold laundry! I hope you didn’t do anything else too crazy like get the mail or take the dog for a walk, because that’d be pushing it. My advice: Put the laundry down, have a Rice Krispy treat, and sit your pregnant ass down before you take things a step too far.

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