Childrearing

I’m Pretty Sure My Kid’s Teacher Hates Me

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The second reason this teacher may not like me is because my daughter Rowan is not in school as much as the other kids, which means added work for her to help my daughter stay on top of things. And I make sure she does. I try to make it as easy on the teachers as possible by just asking what are they learning and we’ll get it done. And she does. So that could be a reason.

Then there was an issue, where there was a writing contest at my daughter’s school, and Rowan didn’t get hers in on time, due to being sick and also at an all-day swim meet the same week. I told my daughter all about deadlines, and if you miss them, well, you don’t get to enter. But then my daughter, in tears, told me three other people in her grade were allowed extensions and she wasn’t. Fair?

Of course I had to complain about this, because I strongly feel you can’t have one rule for one kid and not the others. If even one other kid got an extension, then so should the whole class, or the girls shouldn’t be allowed late entries either.

We got over that hiccup, until I received an e-mail last week from said teacher, saying my daughter was way behind on her homework, way behind on her reading, and she’s disorganized.

I had already made a pact with myself to never e-mail the teacher again, but these were flat out lies. My daughter has to read nine books by the end of April. Her teacher said she was on book two. My daughter was on book number six. I also said she wasn’t falling behind on homework. How could she? She just got a 95% on a math test a few days earlier?

Was I not supposed to defend my daughter? I wrote that she was on book number six and is not at all behind in her homework. I know this. I never heard back.

I’d love to hear from teachers on this (since you can post anonymously!) My friend believes that if a teacher doesn’t like the parent, then most likely they won’t like the kid. Likewise, if they love your kid, they’ll treat the parents better. I’m not so sure about this, as I know a lot of lovely parents with shit-ass kids. I know just as many shit-ass parents that have good kids.

But, for example, if my best friend told me someone was awful to her, well, I wouldn’t go out of my way to be awful to my friend’s ex-friend, but I certainly wouldn’t like her, because I’m loyal to my friend. And before you jump to conclusions, I certainly am NOT the parent who sends e-mail every day, or has ever yelled at the teacher.

Everyone in the world has different personalities and sometimes, like a bad relationship, you both try and try or, as adults, you let the relationship DIE, sometimes without closure. And that’s okay. This goes for all types of relationships.

My issue now, as if I were in a start of a relationship, is what should I do? It’s just so awkward when you know a teacher doesn’t really like you. It’s just a gut feeling I have like the gut feelings my girlfriends have when they decide, like they are hypnotized, to check out their boyfriends password on their phone. Their guts are always right. Of course I’m not going to do that! And neither am I going to beg this teacher to like me (I don’t do begging) or discuss “whether she has an issue with me.”

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