The 5 Stages Of Raising A Kid In A One-Bedroom Apartment

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When you live in a city with astronomical real estate prices, your home can serve as a kind of birth control. Once you find your perfect place, why would you want to move just to procreate? Alternatively, you can be a nut like me and choose both. People have been raising kids in one-bedrooms since the dawn of walls. And they’ve probably faced all the same problems. I’m still not moving anytime soon. but allow me to describe the states of mind that one experiences while living in a tiny space with a child.

1. Idealism
sleeping panda (via)

You scour through Pinterest for inspiration for the perfect ways to decorate the tiny nook in which you’ll keep your coming bundle of joy—who is so small, she won’t need much more space than that little basinet anyway. Even when she arrives, she sleeps all the time (well, except when you want to sleep) through all sorts of loud noises, so space is hardly an issue. “This is great,” you think. “We can do this! Plus, think of all the money we saved by not buying a baby monitor.”

2. Extreme Caution

But somewhere around the time the kid starts being really cute and aware of the world around him, he also pays attention to sounds, particularly during bedtime. You learn where all the creaky boards are in the apartment and begin to do all your household chores in the dark. Too bad the poor lighting means you and your partner can’t communicate with hand signals very clearly. Cry It Out is an aspirational dream when the kid knows you’re standing right there, ignoring him.

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