10 Stripper Names For The Old Lady In Your Life Who Refuses To Be Called ‘Grandma’

By  | 

shutterstock_157004816I have a friend who is married but does not have children yet. Her mom still hasn’t come to terms with the fact that she will eventually be called “grandma.” She doesn’t like it, not one bit. Now, my friend’s mom is a really fun, sweet lady, but she came up with a few off-the-wall ideas that she’s trying to push for grandma names.

Her dream list of grandma names could be used interchangeably for stripper names. A little tyke may not be the wiser, but I’m sure friends and family would snicker at a grandma that insisted on a yoonique name, beyond the traditional Grandma, Gran, Nana, or Mimi.

Or, maybe my friend’s mom is onto something. Stripper names are certainly special, which is why I’ve compiled a top 10 list of the best exotic dancer names that can be used interchangeably for “grandma.”

If you have a young grandma in your life that doesn’t want to cash in her chips just yet, you’ll have 10 adorable monikers to choose from:

1. Angel

Angel may work for a young grandma, and it sure beats a stripper name like Christabel—by a slim margin.

2. Bambi

Bambi just might pass for a young grandma/stripper name, until your kid watches Bambi for the first time and has a terrible association with Grandma for the rest of her life.

3. Bunny

I’ve heard of grandmas called “Bunny” before, but the Playboy Bunny connection is hard to shake.

4. Cashmere

Cashmere is soft, warm, and comforting, and Cashmere’s also shaking her moneymaker in the Champagne Room—hey-o!

5. Cinnamon

This is not made up. This was my friend’s mom’s top grandma name choice.

6. Cookie

Sweet little old grandmas are known for baking cookies, but the name “Cookie” always makes me think of a polite term for lady parts.

7. Diamond

Sounds fancy and all, but it hardly screams loving Nana.

8. Duchess

Eve’s husband calls her “Duchess,” and she’s already got it in the works as her future grandma name.

9. Queenie

I have known some real-life young grandmas that preferred to be called “Queenie” to “Granny.”

10. Precious

This is so adorbs that it just might work. But I don’t think that I could call my mom “Precious” with a straight face.

(Image: michaeljung/Shutterstock)