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You Can Use Your Vibrator to Cheat at Pokemon Go, Dudes Everywhere Are Mad With Envy

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Pokemon Go is better than a FitBit because not only does it count your steps and tell you how far you walk every day, but it also rewards you with cool Pokemon based on how far you walk. Now the women of Japan have figured out how to cheat by using their vibrators to make the game think they’re walking, and I can’t stop laughing about this.

There are two ways to get Pokemon in Pokemon Go: You can catch them in the wild while on walks, or you can hatch them from eggs. To hatch an egg, you just put it in a virtual incubator and then start walking. After the player walks a specified distance–two kilometers for normal Pokemon, five kilometers for cooler Pokemon, 10 kilometers for totally awesome Pokemon–the egg will hatch and the player will get a normal, cool, or totally awesome Pokemon.

 

But now the clever geniuses of Rocket News 24 have figured out that instead of walking, you can just leave a — ahem — a “personal massager” on the screen of a phone or tablet, and the game will think you’re walking.

This cheat is not actually fast, though. It took the reporters at Rocket News 24 10 minutes to make the game think they’d walked 400 meters. At a rate of 400 meters for every 10 minutes, that means it would take about three hours to hatch one of those 10-kilometer eggs.

This might not actually be good for your phone, and it isn’t actually faster than just walking would be, and you get the Pokemon but not the cardio benefit. Still, all my friends are off hatching 10K Pokemon right now, and I’ve been stuck in my home office writing with a toddler in my lap and watching “Where is Thumbkin” videos for the past six hours. So if you’re stuck at home with a kid and can’t go walk your Pokemon eggs, this might be the cheat that saves the day.