{"id":52490,"date":"2012-08-20T09:30:34","date_gmt":"2012-08-20T13:30:34","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/mommyish.com\/?p=52490"},"modified":"2012-10-26T14:43:57","modified_gmt":"2012-10-26T18:43:57","slug":"octomom-sexy-party-595","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/mommyish.com\/octomom-sexy-party-595\/","title":{"rendered":"OctoMom Is Having A Sexy Party — And It’s Not Very Sexy"},"content":{"rendered":"

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<\/strong>Oh Octomom! <\/strong>I wish there was some way I could spin you into not being someone who was so easy to make fun of. I feel for you. It can’t be easy mothering 14 kids. It can’t be fun selling dates <\/a>with yourself on the internet . It’s can’t be fun reading bad reviews of your strip club<\/a> routines. But I’m getting tired of making fun of you. I want to think of nice things to say about you, but it’s really hard. You have pretty hair. There! I did it!<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Octomom<\/strong> seems like she would do anything for money at this point. Need a roofer? Call Octomom<\/strong>! Need someone to bring in your mail when you are out of town? Need someone to pick up your dry-cleaning? Need someone to perform magic tricks at your kid’s birthday party? Octomom<\/strong>! But how do you solve a problem like Nadya?<\/a>\u00a0Because I’m afraid to say she doesn’t have a future as a pop star. She claims she is broke, one million dollars in debt, and all of her kids are under ten. So what’s the solution for someone like Nadya<\/strong>? Maybe she could get a “real job”, she does have a Bachelor of Science degree in child and adolescent development.<\/a>\u00a0If she opened up an Octodaycare then she could have her kids attend preschool there and she wouldn’t have to pay ridiculous childcare costs. When I attempt to view Octomom<\/strong>\u00a0as a real human being with a really bad situation and try and think of how she can fix her life I just can’t come up with any solutions. And then I remember she’s a total weirdo. But with nice hair! And then I get bored and go eat some Goldfish Crackers.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

I think the majority of us have had financial problems at some point or another. In these circumstances we usually comes up with a lot of different solutions that don’t involve recording really awful dance tracks in the hopes it will solve our money woes. \u00a0And the majority of us don’t have 14 kids. And if we do, we usually have a solid plan for supporting them. So what can Octomom<\/strong> do? With fall fast approaching, I’m going to need to mulch my flower beds soon. Maybe I’ll give her a call.<\/p>\n

(Photo: Crushable<\/a><\/strong>)<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Nadya Suleman, in addition to being a porn star and having the world’s most famous clown car uterus, has…<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":21280,"featured_media":52492,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_kad_blocks_custom_css":"","_kad_blocks_head_custom_js":"","_kad_blocks_body_custom_js":"","_kad_blocks_footer_custom_js":"","_kadence_starter_templates_imported_post":false,"_kad_post_transparent":"","_kad_post_title":"","_kad_post_layout":"","_kad_post_sidebar_id":"","_kad_post_content_style":"","_kad_post_vertical_padding":"","_kad_post_feature":"","_kad_post_feature_position":"","_kad_post_header":false,"_kad_post_footer":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[905,921,6,941,58],"tags":[1975,2724],"taxonomy_info":{"category":[{"value":905,"label":"a single mother"},{"value":921,"label":"single parent"},{"value":6,"label":"Stuff"},{"value":941,"label":"therapy"},{"value":58,"label":"working mom"}],"post_tag":[{"value":1975,"label":"Nadya Suleman"},{"value":2724,"label":"Octomom"}]},"featured_image_src_large":["https:\/\/mommyish.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2012\/08\/octomom-topless.jpeg",430,380,false],"author_info":{"display_name":"Eve Vawter","author_link":"https:\/\/mommyish.com\/author\/evevawter\/"},"comment_info":0,"category_info":[{"term_id":905,"name":"a single mother","slug":"a-single-mother","term_group":0,"term_taxonomy_id":922,"taxonomy":"category","description":"","parent":3,"count":37,"filter":"raw","cat_ID":905,"category_count":37,"category_description":"","cat_name":"a single mother","category_nicename":"a-single-mother","category_parent":3},{"term_id":921,"name":"single parent","slug":"single-parent","term_group":0,"term_taxonomy_id":952,"taxonomy":"category","description":"","parent":3,"count":18,"filter":"raw","cat_ID":921,"category_count":18,"category_description":"","cat_name":"single parent","category_nicename":"single-parent","category_parent":3},{"term_id":6,"name":"Stuff","slug":"stuff","term_group":0,"term_taxonomy_id":6,"taxonomy":"category","description":"","parent":0,"count":8931,"filter":"raw","cat_ID":6,"category_count":8931,"category_description":"","cat_name":"Stuff","category_nicename":"stuff","category_parent":0},{"term_id":941,"name":"therapy","slug":"therapy","term_group":0,"term_taxonomy_id":992,"taxonomy":"category","description":"","parent":5,"count":9,"filter":"raw","cat_ID":941,"category_count":9,"category_description":"","cat_name":"therapy","category_nicename":"therapy","category_parent":5},{"term_id":58,"name":"working mom","slug":"working-mom","term_group":0,"term_taxonomy_id":987,"taxonomy":"category","description":"Being a working mom isn't easy. Find ways to balance work life and family life. Get tips on fun ways to be a working mom\r\n","parent":5,"count":81,"filter":"raw","cat_ID":58,"category_count":81,"category_description":"Being a working mom isn't easy. Find ways to balance work life and family life. Get tips on fun ways to be a working mom\r\n","cat_name":"working mom","category_nicename":"working-mom","category_parent":5}],"tag_info":[{"term_id":1975,"name":"Nadya Suleman","slug":"nadya-suleman","term_group":0,"term_taxonomy_id":2036,"taxonomy":"post_tag","description":"","parent":0,"count":8,"filter":"raw"},{"term_id":2724,"name":"Octomom","slug":"octomom","term_group":0,"term_taxonomy_id":2788,"taxonomy":"post_tag","description":"","parent":0,"count":19,"filter":"raw"}],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/mommyish.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/52490"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/mommyish.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/mommyish.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/mommyish.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/21280"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/mommyish.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=52490"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/mommyish.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/52490\/revisions"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/mommyish.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/52492"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/mommyish.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=52490"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/mommyish.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=52490"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/mommyish.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=52490"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}