{"id":210483,"date":"2020-01-03T01:01:24","date_gmt":"2020-01-03T06:01:24","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/mommyish.com\/?p=210483"},"modified":"2020-03-04T10:14:49","modified_gmt":"2020-03-04T15:14:49","slug":"spouse-leaves-zero-tip-says-her-drinks-should-be-free","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/mommyish.com\/spouse-leaves-zero-tip-says-her-drinks-should-be-free\/","title":{"rendered":"Woman Leaves No Tip To Waiter Claiming Her Drinks Should Be Free Because Of Husband&#8217;s Profession"},"content":{"rendered":"<figure id=\"attachment_863093\" aria-describedby=\"caption-attachment-863093\" style=\"width: 640px\" class=\"wp-caption aligncenter\"><img decoding=\"async\" loading=\"lazy\" data-src=\"https:\/\/thewhisp.mommyish.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/02\/waiter.jpg\" alt=\"\" width=\"640\" height=\"400\" class=\"size-full wp-image-863093 lazyload\" src=\"data:image\/gif;base64,R0lGODlhAQABAAAAACH5BAEKAAEALAAAAAABAAEAAAICTAEAOw==\" style=\"--smush-placeholder-width: 640px; --smush-placeholder-aspect-ratio: 640\/400;\" \/><noscript><img decoding=\"async\" loading=\"lazy\" src=\"https:\/\/thewhisp.mommyish.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/02\/waiter.jpg\" alt=\"\" width=\"640\" height=\"400\" class=\"size-full wp-image-863093\" \/><\/noscript><figcaption id=\"caption-attachment-863093\" class=\"wp-caption-text\">Shutterstock<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n<p>Members of the <a href=\"https:\/\/thewhisp.mommyish.com\/entertainment\/tv\/mash-mistakes-missed-continuity-errors\/\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\" target=\"_blank\">armed forces<\/a> and their <a href=\"https:\/\/thewhisp.mommyish.com\/style\/weddings\/nb-bad-wedding-trends\/\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\" target=\"_blank\">spouses<\/a> do a lot to help our country. In this age of political polarization, military service has become a talking point on both sides of the aisle, whether it&#8217;s advocating for increasing benefits for veterans, asking for the government to bring our troops home, or questioning the amount of defense spending that could instead be budgeted towards aid programs at home. Regardless of how you feel about the military, there&#8217;s no denying that the men and women who serve put their lives in danger to protect others, oftentimes leaving behind worried spouses and children. While most military spouses do their best to provide for their families, military &#8220;dependas&#8221; are a controversial and outspoken type of military spouse that believes they&#8217;re entitled to special treatment because of their spouse&#8217;s service. This military spouse leaves zero tip claiming that her drinks at a restaurant should be free because of her husband&#8217;s service &mdash; and it&#8217;s not pretty. <\/p>\n<h2>Military Spouses in America Have It Hard<\/h2>\n<figure id=\"attachment_862523\" aria-describedby=\"caption-attachment-862523\" style=\"width: 600px\" class=\"wp-caption aligncenter\"><img decoding=\"async\" loading=\"lazy\" data-src=\"https:\/\/thewhisp.mommyish.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/02\/shutterstock_659342569.jpg\" alt=\"military\" width=\"600\" height=\"400\" class=\"size-full wp-image-862523 lazyload\" src=\"data:image\/gif;base64,R0lGODlhAQABAAAAACH5BAEKAAEALAAAAAABAAEAAAICTAEAOw==\" style=\"--smush-placeholder-width: 600px; --smush-placeholder-aspect-ratio: 600\/400;\" \/><noscript><img decoding=\"async\" loading=\"lazy\" src=\"https:\/\/thewhisp.mommyish.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/02\/shutterstock_659342569.jpg\" alt=\"military\" width=\"600\" height=\"400\" class=\"size-full wp-image-862523\" \/><\/noscript><figcaption id=\"caption-attachment-862523\" class=\"wp-caption-text\">Shutterstock<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n<p>Life as a military spouse can be rough. Not only does it mean you could be relocated to a new military base at a moments notice, moving your life and your children&#8217;s lives across the country at the whims of the United States government, but it also means that your spouse could be sent to fight overseas during a time of dangerous combat. During deployment, military spouses feel worry and loneliness in addition to the pride they have for their spouse who is serving our military. And that&#8217;s not even mentioning issues with work, social lives, and career flexibility.  <\/p>\n<h2>There Have Been Two Massive Wars in the 21st Century<\/h2>\n<figure id=\"attachment_862522\" aria-describedby=\"caption-attachment-862522\" style=\"width: 600px\" class=\"wp-caption aligncenter\"><img decoding=\"async\" loading=\"lazy\" data-src=\"https:\/\/thewhisp.mommyish.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/02\/shutterstock_83921362.jpg\" alt=\"Military Spouse Leaves Zero\" width=\"600\" height=\"400\" class=\"size-full wp-image-862522 lazyload\" src=\"data:image\/gif;base64,R0lGODlhAQABAAAAACH5BAEKAAEALAAAAAABAAEAAAICTAEAOw==\" style=\"--smush-placeholder-width: 600px; --smush-placeholder-aspect-ratio: 600\/400;\" \/><noscript><img decoding=\"async\" loading=\"lazy\" src=\"https:\/\/thewhisp.mommyish.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/02\/shutterstock_83921362.jpg\" alt=\"Military Spouse Leaves Zero\" width=\"600\" height=\"400\" class=\"size-full wp-image-862522\" \/><\/noscript><figcaption id=\"caption-attachment-862522\" class=\"wp-caption-text\">Shutterstock<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n<p>When the United States invaded Afghanistan in 2001 under the command of President George W. Bush, America began a new wartime era that would continue long after President Bush was out of office. The War on Terror expanded in 2003 when President Bush issued a controversial invasion of Iraq, and although troops were pulled out of the region in 2011, American military forces returned three years later to continue what many have deemed an unwinnable war. Meanwhile, the war in Afghanistan rages on into its second decade of combat. Being a military spouse during wartime makes a difficult situation all the more difficult. <\/p>\n<h2>And Countless Other American-Led Interventions and Operations<\/h2>\n<figure id=\"attachment_862517\" aria-describedby=\"caption-attachment-862517\" style=\"width: 600px\" class=\"wp-caption aligncenter\"><img decoding=\"async\" loading=\"lazy\" data-src=\"https:\/\/thewhisp.mommyish.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/02\/shutterstock_686756764.jpg\" alt=\"military\" width=\"600\" height=\"400\" class=\"size-full wp-image-862517 lazyload\" src=\"data:image\/gif;base64,R0lGODlhAQABAAAAACH5BAEKAAEALAAAAAABAAEAAAICTAEAOw==\" style=\"--smush-placeholder-width: 600px; --smush-placeholder-aspect-ratio: 600\/400;\" \/><noscript><img decoding=\"async\" loading=\"lazy\" src=\"https:\/\/thewhisp.mommyish.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/02\/shutterstock_686756764.jpg\" alt=\"military\" width=\"600\" height=\"400\" class=\"size-full wp-image-862517\" \/><\/noscript><figcaption id=\"caption-attachment-862517\" class=\"wp-caption-text\">Shutterstock<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n<p>In addition to these two major wars fought during the 21st century and the countless wars launched in the three centuries prior, America has involved itself in countless dangerous military operations during the past 20 years as part of the War on Terror. There are ongoing military operations in North-West Pakistan, Somalia, Syria, Libya, and Yemen in addition to successful campaigns in Uganda and Libya that many Americans have never heard about because of their complicated and ever-changing political motivations. It&#8217;s a dangerous time to be a member of the United States military and a stressful time to be a military spouse.<\/p>\n<h2>Military Spouses Do Get Some Benefits For Their Spouses\u2019 Service<\/h2>\n<figure id=\"attachment_862521\" aria-describedby=\"caption-attachment-862521\" style=\"width: 600px\" class=\"wp-caption aligncenter\"><img decoding=\"async\" loading=\"lazy\" data-src=\"https:\/\/thewhisp.mommyish.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/02\/shutterstock_363323057.jpg\" alt=\"Military Spouse Leaves Zero\" width=\"600\" height=\"400\" class=\"size-full wp-image-862521 lazyload\" src=\"data:image\/gif;base64,R0lGODlhAQABAAAAACH5BAEKAAEALAAAAAABAAEAAAICTAEAOw==\" style=\"--smush-placeholder-width: 600px; --smush-placeholder-aspect-ratio: 600\/400;\" \/><noscript><img decoding=\"async\" loading=\"lazy\" src=\"https:\/\/thewhisp.mommyish.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/02\/shutterstock_363323057.jpg\" alt=\"Military Spouse Leaves Zero\" width=\"600\" height=\"400\" class=\"size-full wp-image-862521\" \/><\/noscript><figcaption id=\"caption-attachment-862521\" class=\"wp-caption-text\">Shutterstock<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n<p>There are many benefits provided by the government for military spouses to help alleviate the challenges of life as the spouse of a service member. Automatic benefits include basic allowances for subsistence and housing, family healthcare, access to military commissaries for discounted shopping, childcare on-base, and recreation benefits like youth programs, on-base centers with gyms, pools, bowling alleys, and stables, and several options for resort vacations. Spouses can also apply for benefits such as life insurance coverage, financial assistance for spouses pursuing a license, certification, or Associates Degree, a small business loan program, transferred GI Bill benefits, or preferential employment in Department of Defence civilian positions. <\/p>\n<h2>And There Are Always Corporate Perks<\/h2>\n<figure id=\"attachment_862520\" aria-describedby=\"caption-attachment-862520\" style=\"width: 600px\" class=\"wp-caption aligncenter\"><img decoding=\"async\" loading=\"lazy\" data-src=\"https:\/\/thewhisp.mommyish.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/02\/shutterstock_785440960.jpg\" alt=\"mall\" width=\"600\" height=\"400\" class=\"size-full wp-image-862520 lazyload\" src=\"data:image\/gif;base64,R0lGODlhAQABAAAAACH5BAEKAAEALAAAAAABAAEAAAICTAEAOw==\" style=\"--smush-placeholder-width: 600px; --smush-placeholder-aspect-ratio: 600\/400;\" \/><noscript><img decoding=\"async\" loading=\"lazy\" src=\"https:\/\/thewhisp.mommyish.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/02\/shutterstock_785440960.jpg\" alt=\"mall\" width=\"600\" height=\"400\" class=\"size-full wp-image-862520\" \/><\/noscript><figcaption id=\"caption-attachment-862520\" class=\"wp-caption-text\">Shutterstock<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n<p>Disney&#8217;s Armed Forces Salute program gets military spouses discounted tickets to theme parks and discounts off rooms at Disney Resort hotels. Other amusement parks like LEGOLAND, Universal Studios, and Colonial Williamsburg also offer discounts to military families, often without the service member needing to be present. Restaurants like Bubba Gump Shrimp Co., the Melting Pot, or other chains offer military appreciation discounts for military spouses, and stores like Old Navy, Banana Republic, Vera Bradley, and Columbia are just a few retailers that share the military family discount love. And don&#8217;t forget about local discounts, movie theatres, craft supply stores, cruises, and countless other corporate discounts accessible to military families. <\/p>\n<h2>But It\u2019s Just Not Enough<\/h2>\n<figure id=\"attachment_862519\" aria-describedby=\"caption-attachment-862519\" style=\"width: 600px\" class=\"wp-caption aligncenter\"><img decoding=\"async\" loading=\"lazy\" data-src=\"https:\/\/thewhisp.mommyish.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/02\/shutterstock_1418182373.jpg\" alt=\"Military Spouse Leaves Zero\" width=\"600\" height=\"400\" class=\"size-full wp-image-862519 lazyload\" src=\"data:image\/gif;base64,R0lGODlhAQABAAAAACH5BAEKAAEALAAAAAABAAEAAAICTAEAOw==\" style=\"--smush-placeholder-width: 600px; --smush-placeholder-aspect-ratio: 600\/400;\" \/><noscript><img decoding=\"async\" loading=\"lazy\" src=\"https:\/\/thewhisp.mommyish.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/02\/shutterstock_1418182373.jpg\" alt=\"Military Spouse Leaves Zero\" width=\"600\" height=\"400\" class=\"size-full wp-image-862519\" \/><\/noscript><figcaption id=\"caption-attachment-862519\" class=\"wp-caption-text\">Shutterstock<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n<p>Still, these discounts are just not enough for many military families struggling to make ends meet. <em><a href=\"https:\/\/www.npr.org\/sections\/thesalt\/2017\/04\/19\/524563155\/when-active-duty-service-members-struggle-to-feed-their-families\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\" target=\"_blank\">NPR<\/a><\/em> learned that many military families rely on food stamps or are in need of food assistance, and the entry-level salary for new service members easily places these E-1s with families under the poverty line. The Department of Defense hasn&#8217;t collected data on how many of its service members are in need despite the Government Accountability Office finding signs that there could be as many as 1 in 4 military families under the poverty line. Meanwhile, DoD spending continues to rise as veterans and military families are ignored.  <\/p>\n<h2>Because It\u2019s Much Harder For Military Spouses To Find Jobs<\/h2>\n<figure id=\"attachment_862516\" aria-describedby=\"caption-attachment-862516\" style=\"width: 600px\" class=\"wp-caption aligncenter\"><img decoding=\"async\" loading=\"lazy\" data-src=\"https:\/\/thewhisp.mommyish.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/02\/shutterstock_1418182469.jpg\" alt=\"military\" width=\"600\" height=\"400\" class=\"size-full wp-image-862516 lazyload\" src=\"data:image\/gif;base64,R0lGODlhAQABAAAAACH5BAEKAAEALAAAAAABAAEAAAICTAEAOw==\" style=\"--smush-placeholder-width: 600px; --smush-placeholder-aspect-ratio: 600\/400;\" \/><noscript><img decoding=\"async\" loading=\"lazy\" src=\"https:\/\/thewhisp.mommyish.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/02\/shutterstock_1418182469.jpg\" alt=\"military\" width=\"600\" height=\"400\" class=\"size-full wp-image-862516\" \/><\/noscript><figcaption id=\"caption-attachment-862516\" class=\"wp-caption-text\">Shutterstock<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n<p>Contributing to this is the fact that military spouses find it much harder to obtain jobs than civilians. <em><a href=\"https:\/\/www.theatlantic.com\/family\/archive\/2019\/03\/majority-military-spouses-are-underemployed\/585586\/\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\" target=\"_blank\">The Atlantic<\/a><\/em> learned that nearly two-thirds of military families are stressed about finances, often because the nonmilitary spouse is unemployed or underemployed. This unemployment rate is six times the 2017 national average and more than double the unemployment rate in America&#8217;s most impoverished areas. It&#8217;s difficult to find industries willing to accommodate remote work or the near-constant relocation of military life, especially when they&#8217;re taken overseas. Even if they could find work, military spouses make $10,000 less than their civilian peers, and it&#8217;s very difficult to find reliable access to child care. <\/p>\n<h2>Especially If They\u2019re Women<\/h2>\n<figure id=\"attachment_862513\" aria-describedby=\"caption-attachment-862513\" style=\"width: 600px\" class=\"wp-caption aligncenter\"><img decoding=\"async\" loading=\"lazy\" data-src=\"https:\/\/thewhisp.mommyish.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/02\/shutterstock_1486347653.jpg\" alt=\"Military Spouse Leaves Zero\" width=\"600\" height=\"400\" class=\"size-full wp-image-862513 lazyload\" src=\"data:image\/gif;base64,R0lGODlhAQABAAAAACH5BAEKAAEALAAAAAABAAEAAAICTAEAOw==\" style=\"--smush-placeholder-width: 600px; --smush-placeholder-aspect-ratio: 600\/400;\" \/><noscript><img decoding=\"async\" loading=\"lazy\" src=\"https:\/\/thewhisp.mommyish.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/02\/shutterstock_1486347653.jpg\" alt=\"Military Spouse Leaves Zero\" width=\"600\" height=\"400\" class=\"size-full wp-image-862513\" \/><\/noscript><figcaption id=\"caption-attachment-862513\" class=\"wp-caption-text\">Shutterstock<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n<p><em><a href=\"https:\/\/www.theatlantic.com\/family\/archive\/2019\/03\/majority-military-spouses-are-underemployed\/585586\/\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\" target=\"_blank\">The Atlantic<\/a><\/em> also pointed out that nine out of 10 military spouses are women, which means they&#8217;re already dealing with the multitude of issues that come with being a working woman in America. There&#8217;s the oft-discussed motherhood penalty in the workplace and a growing wage gap between the genders. This difficulty isn&#8217;t because of an education gap &mdash; military spouses are statistically more educated than other civilian Americans &mdash; but professional licenses for law, teaching, or medicine don&#8217;t always transfer across state lines, even when their spouse has been relocated. <\/p>\n<h2>Some Companies Are Military-Family-Friendly<\/h2>\n<figure id=\"attachment_862515\" aria-describedby=\"caption-attachment-862515\" style=\"width: 600px\" class=\"wp-caption aligncenter\"><img decoding=\"async\" loading=\"lazy\" data-src=\"https:\/\/thewhisp.mommyish.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/02\/shutterstock_1075910024.jpg\" alt=\"starbucks\" width=\"600\" height=\"400\" class=\"size-full wp-image-862515 lazyload\" src=\"data:image\/gif;base64,R0lGODlhAQABAAAAACH5BAEKAAEALAAAAAABAAEAAAICTAEAOw==\" style=\"--smush-placeholder-width: 600px; --smush-placeholder-aspect-ratio: 600\/400;\" \/><noscript><img decoding=\"async\" loading=\"lazy\" src=\"https:\/\/thewhisp.mommyish.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/02\/shutterstock_1075910024.jpg\" alt=\"starbucks\" width=\"600\" height=\"400\" class=\"size-full wp-image-862515\" \/><\/noscript><figcaption id=\"caption-attachment-862515\" class=\"wp-caption-text\">Shutterstock<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n<p>In 2013, Starbucks publicly committed to hiring 10,000 veterans and military spouses in the next five years, then exceeded that goal two years ahead of its schedule. They responded by increasing their commitment to hiring 25,000 veterans and military spouses by 2025 in addition to hiring 5,000 veterans and military spouses annually, opening Starbucks Military Family Stores to offer transition guidance and networking, and expanding benefits that include education opportunities. Hilton has hired 30,000 veterans, spouses, and dependants over the past six years and offers the opportunity to work from home, while Microsoft created a technology career pipeline called the Microsoft Software &#038; Systems Academy (MSSA) program with additional resources for military spouses. <\/p>\n<h2>And The Government Provides Programs for Spouses<\/h2>\n<figure id=\"attachment_862514\" aria-describedby=\"caption-attachment-862514\" style=\"width: 600px\" class=\"wp-caption aligncenter\"><img decoding=\"async\" loading=\"lazy\" data-src=\"https:\/\/thewhisp.mommyish.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/02\/shutterstock_1282223701.jpg\" alt=\"Military Spouse Leaves Zero\" width=\"600\" height=\"400\" class=\"size-full wp-image-862514 lazyload\" src=\"data:image\/gif;base64,R0lGODlhAQABAAAAACH5BAEKAAEALAAAAAABAAEAAAICTAEAOw==\" style=\"--smush-placeholder-width: 600px; --smush-placeholder-aspect-ratio: 600\/400;\" \/><noscript><img decoding=\"async\" loading=\"lazy\" src=\"https:\/\/thewhisp.mommyish.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/02\/shutterstock_1282223701.jpg\" alt=\"Military Spouse Leaves Zero\" width=\"600\" height=\"400\" class=\"size-full wp-image-862514\" \/><\/noscript><figcaption id=\"caption-attachment-862514\" class=\"wp-caption-text\">Shutterstock<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n<p>The United States government does its part to help military spouses as well through the U.S. Chamber of Commerce Foundation&#8217;s Hiring Our Heroes programs and events which offer networking and development opportunities, hiring events, career intensives, economic empowerment zones, and a fellowship program. In collaboration with Starbucks, the U.S. Chamber of Commerce Foundation has pledged to hire 100,000 military spouses over the next three years, partnering with companies across the United States like Microsoft, Prudential, USAA, Hilton, Comcast, Carmax, Capital One, Amazon, Blackstone, and the Biden Foundation to close the military spouse unemployment gap. <\/p>\n<h2>But These Spouses Are Also At Risk Of Being Taken Advantage Of<\/h2>\n<figure id=\"attachment_862510\" aria-describedby=\"caption-attachment-862510\" style=\"width: 600px\" class=\"wp-caption aligncenter\"><img decoding=\"async\" loading=\"lazy\" data-src=\"https:\/\/thewhisp.mommyish.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/02\/shutterstock_1486347674.jpg\" alt=\"military\" width=\"600\" height=\"400\" class=\"size-full wp-image-862510 lazyload\" src=\"data:image\/gif;base64,R0lGODlhAQABAAAAACH5BAEKAAEALAAAAAABAAEAAAICTAEAOw==\" style=\"--smush-placeholder-width: 600px; --smush-placeholder-aspect-ratio: 600\/400;\" \/><noscript><img decoding=\"async\" loading=\"lazy\" src=\"https:\/\/thewhisp.mommyish.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/02\/shutterstock_1486347674.jpg\" alt=\"military\" width=\"600\" height=\"400\" class=\"size-full wp-image-862510\" \/><\/noscript><figcaption id=\"caption-attachment-862510\" class=\"wp-caption-text\">Shutterstock<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n<p>Unfortunately, not everyone is as helpful as corporations like Starbucks, Hilton, and Microsoft. Some people see the struggles of military spouses as an opportunity for scams like multilevel-marketing corporations (AKA pyramid schemes) that the Federal Trade Commission has learned hurt families instead of helping them with 99 percent of employees losing money through these &#8220;businesses.&#8221; One called Scentsy has been called out on many <a href=\"https:\/\/www.reddit.com\/r\/justdependathings\/comments\/f9aol2\/got_onto_the_wives_page_out_here_for_my_wife\/\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\" target=\"_blank\">Reddit<\/a> <a href=\"https:\/\/www.reddit.com\/r\/justdependathings\/comments\/fa0gbt\/starting_her_career_selling_scentsy\/\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\" target=\"_blank\">posts<\/a> as being a multilevel-marketing company that targets military spouses. Military families are also more likely to take payday loans, which are high-cost, short-term loans that are often given to people with bad credit, meaning interest can skyrocket. <\/p>\n<h2>And Same-Sex Spouses Struggle Even More Than Their Heterosexual Counterparts<\/h2>\n<figure id=\"attachment_862512\" aria-describedby=\"caption-attachment-862512\" style=\"width: 600px\" class=\"wp-caption aligncenter\"><img decoding=\"async\" loading=\"lazy\" data-src=\"https:\/\/thewhisp.mommyish.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/02\/shutterstock_247938955.jpg\" alt=\"Military Spouse Leaves Zero\" width=\"600\" height=\"400\" class=\"size-full wp-image-862512 lazyload\" src=\"data:image\/gif;base64,R0lGODlhAQABAAAAACH5BAEKAAEALAAAAAABAAEAAAICTAEAOw==\" style=\"--smush-placeholder-width: 600px; --smush-placeholder-aspect-ratio: 600\/400;\" \/><noscript><img decoding=\"async\" loading=\"lazy\" src=\"https:\/\/thewhisp.mommyish.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/02\/shutterstock_247938955.jpg\" alt=\"Military Spouse Leaves Zero\" width=\"600\" height=\"400\" class=\"size-full wp-image-862512\" \/><\/noscript><figcaption id=\"caption-attachment-862512\" class=\"wp-caption-text\">Shutterstock<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n<p>It&#8217;s no surprise that LGBTQ+ couples in the military face even larger struggles than many of their heterosexual counterparts. Don&#8217;t Ask, Don&#8217;t Tell, the misguided, homophobic stance on LGBTQ in the military instituted by the Clinton Administration, was only repealed in 2011, and it continues to impact the military today. The first same-sex partner was allowed to be buried in a veteran&#8217;s cemetery in 2013, as <em><a href=\"https:\/\/mommyish.com\/military-families\/\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\" target=\"_blank\">Mommyish<\/a><\/em> reported.  Same-sex marriage wasn&#8217;t even legal nationwide until 2015. And that&#8217;s not to mention the rampant sexism and homophobia among many conservatives and the current ban on transgender troops. It&#8217;s no wonder that LGBTQ military families have even more trouble finding employment than their cis, hetero counterparts. <\/p>\n<h2>There Was Even A Viral Movement Supporting Former Military Spouses<\/h2>\n<figure id=\"attachment_862518\" aria-describedby=\"caption-attachment-862518\" style=\"width: 600px\" class=\"wp-caption aligncenter\"><img decoding=\"async\" loading=\"lazy\" data-src=\"https:\/\/thewhisp.mommyish.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/02\/shutterstock_362454800.jpg\" alt=\"military\" width=\"600\" height=\"400\" class=\"size-full wp-image-862518 lazyload\" src=\"data:image\/gif;base64,R0lGODlhAQABAAAAACH5BAEKAAEALAAAAAABAAEAAAICTAEAOw==\" style=\"--smush-placeholder-width: 600px; --smush-placeholder-aspect-ratio: 600\/400;\" \/><noscript><img decoding=\"async\" loading=\"lazy\" src=\"https:\/\/thewhisp.mommyish.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/02\/shutterstock_362454800.jpg\" alt=\"military\" width=\"600\" height=\"400\" class=\"size-full wp-image-862518\" \/><\/noscript><figcaption id=\"caption-attachment-862518\" class=\"wp-caption-text\">Shutterstock<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n<p>After making all of these sacrifices to support their spouses&#8217; careers in the military, with military spouses altering their career paths and dealing with unemployment, not all military marriages last. As within the civilian population, there&#8217;s a sadly high divorce rate amongst military marriages, and not all military benefits extend to former spouses of soldiers. The controversial hashtag #WeServedToo trended on <a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/AHomefrontGirl\/status\/1156835387970596865\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\" target=\"_blank\">Twitter<\/a> in 2019 opposing the Department of Defense&#8217;s military rule that leaves military spouses with no healthcare in a divorce. Many opposed the sentiment that military spouses also &#8220;served,&#8221; while others agreed that the sacrifices made by military spouses merited continued healthcare because healthcare is a universal right for all.  <\/p>\n<h2>But Not Everyone Was Happy About It<\/h2>\n<figure id=\"attachment_862511\" aria-describedby=\"caption-attachment-862511\" style=\"width: 600px\" class=\"wp-caption aligncenter\"><img decoding=\"async\" loading=\"lazy\" data-src=\"https:\/\/thewhisp.mommyish.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/02\/shutterstock_442382125.jpg\" alt=\"Military Spouse Leaves Zero\" width=\"600\" height=\"400\" class=\"size-full wp-image-862511 lazyload\" src=\"data:image\/gif;base64,R0lGODlhAQABAAAAACH5BAEKAAEALAAAAAABAAEAAAICTAEAOw==\" style=\"--smush-placeholder-width: 600px; --smush-placeholder-aspect-ratio: 600\/400;\" \/><noscript><img decoding=\"async\" loading=\"lazy\" src=\"https:\/\/thewhisp.mommyish.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/02\/shutterstock_442382125.jpg\" alt=\"Military Spouse Leaves Zero\" width=\"600\" height=\"400\" class=\"size-full wp-image-862511\" \/><\/noscript><figcaption id=\"caption-attachment-862511\" class=\"wp-caption-text\">Shutterstock<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n<p>Not everyone was happy about the #WeServedToo hashtag trending. <a href=\"https:\/\/www.reddit.com\/r\/justdependathings\/comments\/f9itau\/formerdependasservedtoo_ugh\/\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\" target=\"_blank\">Reddit user joprlady<\/a> posted a screenshot of one Twitter user&#8217;s link to a Change.org petition in favor of granting former military spouses healthcare with the caption, &#8220;#formerdependasservedtoo UGH!,&#8221; with commenters noting that former spouses didn&#8217;t literally serve and noting that children of service members retain their healthcare even if they live with the former spouse. Others argued that former spouses shouldn&#8217;t receive these benefits until all veterans have them as well, but in reality, we should be arguing that everyone should have healthcare independent of employers or spouses. <\/p>\n<h2>Because Some Military Spouses Are Considered \u201dDependas\u201d\u009d<\/h2>\n<figure id=\"attachment_862509\" aria-describedby=\"caption-attachment-862509\" style=\"width: 600px\" class=\"wp-caption aligncenter\"><img decoding=\"async\" loading=\"lazy\" data-src=\"https:\/\/thewhisp.mommyish.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/02\/shutterstock_492308887.jpg\" alt=\"dependas\" width=\"600\" height=\"400\" class=\"size-full wp-image-862509 lazyload\" src=\"data:image\/gif;base64,R0lGODlhAQABAAAAACH5BAEKAAEALAAAAAABAAEAAAICTAEAOw==\" style=\"--smush-placeholder-width: 600px; --smush-placeholder-aspect-ratio: 600\/400;\" \/><noscript><img decoding=\"async\" loading=\"lazy\" src=\"https:\/\/thewhisp.mommyish.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/02\/shutterstock_492308887.jpg\" alt=\"dependas\" width=\"600\" height=\"400\" class=\"size-full wp-image-862509\" \/><\/noscript><figcaption id=\"caption-attachment-862509\" class=\"wp-caption-text\">Shutterstock<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n<p>For the uninitiated, &#8220;dependa&#8221; is not a term that applies to all military spouses. While all military spouses are dependents unless they&#8217;re active duty, &#8220;dependa&#8221; is a derogatory term used to describe spouses who believe they&#8217;re entitled to special treatment because of their spouse&#8217;s rank. <em><a href=\"https:\/\/seasonedspouse.com\/might-get-called-dependa\/\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\" target=\"_blank\">Seasoned Spouse<\/a><\/em> describes the term as mostly being employed by other military spouses against each other when they cause drama, complain, or break one of the unwritten rules of conduct like complaining about benefits, wearing your spouse&#8217;s uniform, bragging, or being sedentary. While there shouldn&#8217;t be a &#8220;right way&#8221; to be a spouse, this story makes the term a little easier to understand&#8230; <\/p>\n<h2>And This Dependa Decided to Take Matters Into Her Own Hands<\/h2>\n<figure id=\"attachment_862508\" aria-describedby=\"caption-attachment-862508\" style=\"width: 600px\" class=\"wp-caption aligncenter\"><img decoding=\"async\" loading=\"lazy\" data-src=\"https:\/\/thewhisp.mommyish.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/02\/shutterstock_653232718.jpg\" alt=\"Military Spouse Leaves Zero\" width=\"600\" height=\"400\" class=\"size-full wp-image-862508 lazyload\" src=\"data:image\/gif;base64,R0lGODlhAQABAAAAACH5BAEKAAEALAAAAAABAAEAAAICTAEAOw==\" style=\"--smush-placeholder-width: 600px; --smush-placeholder-aspect-ratio: 600\/400;\" \/><noscript><img decoding=\"async\" loading=\"lazy\" src=\"https:\/\/thewhisp.mommyish.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/02\/shutterstock_653232718.jpg\" alt=\"Military Spouse Leaves Zero\" width=\"600\" height=\"400\" class=\"size-full wp-image-862508\" \/><\/noscript><figcaption id=\"caption-attachment-862508\" class=\"wp-caption-text\">Shutterstock<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n<p>One &#8220;dependa&#8221; made a big social faux pas two days into 2020 when she went for drinks. Her card was swiped just before 10PM on January 2, 2020, but photos of her receipt were already picked up by Reddit within hours. Sadly, this dependa didn&#8217;t make a virtual footprint for being a do-gooder, helping others, or upholding Army values of loyalty, duty, respect, selfless service, honor, integrity, or personal courage. Instead, she believed she was entitled to special treatment for being a military spouse, even if it might sadden or negatively impact others. <\/p>\n<h2>This Military Spouse Ordered $25 in Drinks<\/h2>\n<figure id=\"attachment_862507\" aria-describedby=\"caption-attachment-862507\" style=\"width: 600px\" class=\"wp-caption aligncenter\"><img decoding=\"async\" loading=\"lazy\" data-src=\"https:\/\/thewhisp.mommyish.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/02\/shutterstock_720722653.jpg\" alt=\"drinks\" width=\"600\" height=\"400\" class=\"size-full wp-image-862507 lazyload\" src=\"data:image\/gif;base64,R0lGODlhAQABAAAAACH5BAEKAAEALAAAAAABAAEAAAICTAEAOw==\" style=\"--smush-placeholder-width: 600px; --smush-placeholder-aspect-ratio: 600\/400;\" \/><noscript><img decoding=\"async\" loading=\"lazy\" src=\"https:\/\/thewhisp.mommyish.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/02\/shutterstock_720722653.jpg\" alt=\"drinks\" width=\"600\" height=\"400\" class=\"size-full wp-image-862507\" \/><\/noscript><figcaption id=\"caption-attachment-862507\" class=\"wp-caption-text\">Shutterstock<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n<p>The receipt, shared on Reddit, showed two 12 dollar glasses of La Crema Chardonnay, coming to $25.68 after tax. On a 25 dollar bill, a 20 percent tip would only be five dollars. If you&#8217;re strapped for cash, just leaving a 10 percent tip (which is really the lowest acceptable amount) would only cost $2.50. That&#8217;s less than the cost of a half-pint of Ben &#038; Jerry&#8217;s Ice Cream, a jar of Tostitos salsa, a jar of generic brand peanut butter, or a bag of Oreos. You couldn&#8217;t even buy a McDonald&#8217;s Big Mac for that little money. <\/p>\n<h2>And She Left No Tip<\/h2>\n<figure id=\"attachment_862506\" aria-describedby=\"caption-attachment-862506\" style=\"width: 600px\" class=\"wp-caption aligncenter\"><img decoding=\"async\" loading=\"lazy\" data-src=\"https:\/\/thewhisp.mommyish.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/02\/shutterstock_1120520999.jpg\" alt=\"Military Spouse Leaves Zero\" width=\"600\" height=\"400\" class=\"size-full wp-image-862506 lazyload\" src=\"data:image\/gif;base64,R0lGODlhAQABAAAAACH5BAEKAAEALAAAAAABAAEAAAICTAEAOw==\" style=\"--smush-placeholder-width: 600px; --smush-placeholder-aspect-ratio: 600\/400;\" \/><noscript><img decoding=\"async\" loading=\"lazy\" src=\"https:\/\/thewhisp.mommyish.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/02\/shutterstock_1120520999.jpg\" alt=\"Military Spouse Leaves Zero\" width=\"600\" height=\"400\" class=\"size-full wp-image-862506\" \/><\/noscript><figcaption id=\"caption-attachment-862506\" class=\"wp-caption-text\">Shutterstock<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n<p>Instead of tipping $2.50 on her 25 dollar check, an amount of money that&#8217;s so small, you couldn&#8217;t even order a meal at McDonald&#8217;s using it, this woman decided to leave no tip on her 25 dollar check. It wasn&#8217;t because the service was bad or because there was something wrong with her order &mdash; although, there is no good reason to not tip your server because tips shouldn&#8217;t be based on the perceived quality of service. This military spouse chose to not tip her waiter or waitress for a much more ridiculous reason. <\/p>\n<h2>We Prefer When Big Tips Go Viral<\/h2>\n<figure id=\"attachment_862505\" aria-describedby=\"caption-attachment-862505\" style=\"width: 600px\" class=\"wp-caption aligncenter\"><img decoding=\"async\" loading=\"lazy\" data-src=\"https:\/\/thewhisp.mommyish.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/02\/shutterstock_128896511.jpg\" alt=\"money\" width=\"600\" height=\"400\" class=\"size-full wp-image-862505 lazyload\" src=\"data:image\/gif;base64,R0lGODlhAQABAAAAACH5BAEKAAEALAAAAAABAAEAAAICTAEAOw==\" style=\"--smush-placeholder-width: 600px; --smush-placeholder-aspect-ratio: 600\/400;\" \/><noscript><img decoding=\"async\" loading=\"lazy\" src=\"https:\/\/thewhisp.mommyish.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/02\/shutterstock_128896511.jpg\" alt=\"money\" width=\"600\" height=\"400\" class=\"size-full wp-image-862505\" \/><\/noscript><figcaption id=\"caption-attachment-862505\" class=\"wp-caption-text\">Shutterstock<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n<p>It&#8217;s sad to report on a crazy story about someone *not* leaving a tip. We much prefer viral stories about big tippers, like this <a href=\"https:\/\/www.nbcwashington.com\/entertainment\/entertainment-news\/it-was-unreal-suburban-waitress-in-shock-after-receiving-huge-tip-from-donnie-wahlberg-jenny-mccarthy\/2195474\/\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\" target=\"_blank\">NBC Washington<\/a> story about <b>Donnie Wahlberg<\/b> and <b>Jenny McCarthy<\/b>. On the same day that this military spouse left no tip for her server, these celebrities left a $2,020 tip at their local IHOP on their $78 bill, encouraging others to do the same with a #2020TipChallenge. Many others on Twitter followed suit, tipping $20.20 if they couldn&#8217;t afford a full $2,020 tip because not all of us are millionaires or celebrities. What a generous, kind thing to do! <\/p>\n<h2>Food Service Workers Have It Hard Too<\/h2>\n<figure id=\"attachment_862503\" aria-describedby=\"caption-attachment-862503\" style=\"width: 600px\" class=\"wp-caption aligncenter\"><img decoding=\"async\" loading=\"lazy\" data-src=\"https:\/\/thewhisp.mommyish.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/02\/shutterstock_776178658.jpg\" alt=\"Military Spouse Leaves Zero\" width=\"600\" height=\"400\" class=\"size-full wp-image-862503 lazyload\" src=\"data:image\/gif;base64,R0lGODlhAQABAAAAACH5BAEKAAEALAAAAAABAAEAAAICTAEAOw==\" style=\"--smush-placeholder-width: 600px; --smush-placeholder-aspect-ratio: 600\/400;\" \/><noscript><img decoding=\"async\" loading=\"lazy\" src=\"https:\/\/thewhisp.mommyish.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/02\/shutterstock_776178658.jpg\" alt=\"Military Spouse Leaves Zero\" width=\"600\" height=\"400\" class=\"size-full wp-image-862503\" \/><\/noscript><figcaption id=\"caption-attachment-862503\" class=\"wp-caption-text\">Shutterstock<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n<p>Jobs within the food service industry, especially as a server, can be very physically demanding. Having to be in an outward-facing customer service role is emotionally taxing as well, showing up with a positive attitude even in the face of rude customers, a busy lunch rush, or a bad personal day. While working as a server isn&#8217;t comparable to being in the armed forces, food services workers do make a low hourly wage and often have to take multiple jobs within the industry in order to make ends meet. All people deserve a living wage, and that&#8217;s why tipping is so important. <\/p>\n<h2>And Tipping Is Important<\/h2>\n<figure id=\"attachment_862504\" aria-describedby=\"caption-attachment-862504\" style=\"width: 600px\" class=\"wp-caption aligncenter\"><img decoding=\"async\" loading=\"lazy\" data-src=\"https:\/\/thewhisp.mommyish.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/02\/shutterstock_655955302.jpg\" alt=\"tipping\" width=\"600\" height=\"400\" class=\"size-full wp-image-862504 lazyload\" src=\"data:image\/gif;base64,R0lGODlhAQABAAAAACH5BAEKAAEALAAAAAABAAEAAAICTAEAOw==\" style=\"--smush-placeholder-width: 600px; --smush-placeholder-aspect-ratio: 600\/400;\" \/><noscript><img decoding=\"async\" loading=\"lazy\" src=\"https:\/\/thewhisp.mommyish.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/02\/shutterstock_655955302.jpg\" alt=\"tipping\" width=\"600\" height=\"400\" class=\"size-full wp-image-862504\" \/><\/noscript><figcaption id=\"caption-attachment-862504\" class=\"wp-caption-text\">Shutterstock<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n<p>Tipping your server could be the difference between them making 30 dollars in a day or 300 dollars, and those numbers are so dependent on the kindness and decency of strangers that their income can be very unstable. Others have to live off tips alone. That $2.50 that couldn&#8217;t even buy this military spouse a Big Mac contributes to a system that allows servers to earn a living wage. And if the tips are split amongst servers at the end of the night, she isn&#8217;t just affecting her server, she&#8217;s affecting the entire staff. The reason tipping isn&#8217;t common in other countries, like Spain or France, is because those countries pay their service staff a living wage or include gratuity in the check automatically. Aside from the very real economic implications of tipping, not leaving a tip is just plain rude. <\/p>\n<h2>This No-Tip Military Spouse Left A Comment On Her Receipt<\/h2>\n<figure id=\"attachment_862488\" aria-describedby=\"caption-attachment-862488\" style=\"width: 600px\" class=\"wp-caption aligncenter\"><img decoding=\"async\" loading=\"lazy\" data-src=\"https:\/\/thewhisp.mommyish.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/02\/military-spouse-1.jpg\" alt=\"Military Spouse Leaves Zero\" width=\"600\" height=\"400\" class=\"size-full wp-image-862488 lazyload\" src=\"data:image\/gif;base64,R0lGODlhAQABAAAAACH5BAEKAAEALAAAAAABAAEAAAICTAEAOw==\" style=\"--smush-placeholder-width: 600px; --smush-placeholder-aspect-ratio: 600\/400;\" \/><noscript><img decoding=\"async\" loading=\"lazy\" src=\"https:\/\/thewhisp.mommyish.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/02\/military-spouse-1.jpg\" alt=\"Military Spouse Leaves Zero\" width=\"600\" height=\"400\" class=\"size-full wp-image-862488\" \/><\/noscript><figcaption id=\"caption-attachment-862488\" class=\"wp-caption-text\"><a href=\"https:\/\/www.reddit.com\/r\/trashy\/comments\/ejfmt7\/entitled_military_spouse_demands_free_meals\/\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\" target=\"_blank\">Reddit<\/a><\/figcaption><\/figure>\n<p>This particular military spouse didn&#8217;t just refrain from tipping her server in the early days of 2020. She had to add insult to injury by leaving a comment on her receipt under &#8220;Grand Total.&#8221; The military spouse wrote, &#8220;I&#8217;m a military spouse, it should be free &mdash; next time thank a military spouse :)&#8221; This is the type of entitled behavior that gets spouses deemed &#8220;dependas,&#8221; because she believed she should drink for free at a restaurant that clearly does not have a discount for military spouses, something she could have called ahead and asked about in advance if it was so important to her.  <\/p>\n<h2>And It Didn\u2019t Even Make Sense<\/h2>\n<figure id=\"attachment_862490\" aria-describedby=\"caption-attachment-862490\" style=\"width: 600px\" class=\"wp-caption aligncenter\"><img decoding=\"async\" loading=\"lazy\" data-src=\"https:\/\/thewhisp.mommyish.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/02\/shutterstock_790043248.jpg\" alt=\"confusion\" width=\"600\" height=\"400\" class=\"size-full wp-image-862490 lazyload\" src=\"data:image\/gif;base64,R0lGODlhAQABAAAAACH5BAEKAAEALAAAAAABAAEAAAICTAEAOw==\" style=\"--smush-placeholder-width: 600px; --smush-placeholder-aspect-ratio: 600\/400;\" \/><noscript><img decoding=\"async\" loading=\"lazy\" src=\"https:\/\/thewhisp.mommyish.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/02\/shutterstock_790043248.jpg\" alt=\"confusion\" width=\"600\" height=\"400\" class=\"size-full wp-image-862490\" \/><\/noscript><figcaption id=\"caption-attachment-862490\" class=\"wp-caption-text\">Shutterstock<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n<p>Beyond the rudeness of giving unsolicited advice in place of a tip, this military spouse&#8217;s argument didn&#8217;t even make sense. While some restaurants offer military discounts for spouses, which is something she could have researched before, a discount wouldn&#8217;t make her drinks free. Assuming she was drinking with a friend, it would not have made her friend&#8217;s drink free either or necessarily been applied to their item. There&#8217;s also the question as to whether this spouse showed her military ID &mdash; how was their server supposed to know this woman was a military spouse? And even if she did want to give this woman a free drink, it&#8217;s likely she wouldn&#8217;t be allowed to give away alcohol without the approval of her direct boss. <\/p>\n<h2>Unfortunately, This Type Of Behavior Isn\u2019t Uncommon<\/h2>\n<figure id=\"attachment_862499\" aria-describedby=\"caption-attachment-862499\" style=\"width: 600px\" class=\"wp-caption aligncenter\"><img decoding=\"async\" loading=\"lazy\" data-src=\"https:\/\/thewhisp.mommyish.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/02\/shutterstock_1157376808.jpg\" alt=\"Military Spouse Leaves Zero\" width=\"600\" height=\"400\" class=\"size-full wp-image-862499 lazyload\" src=\"data:image\/gif;base64,R0lGODlhAQABAAAAACH5BAEKAAEALAAAAAABAAEAAAICTAEAOw==\" style=\"--smush-placeholder-width: 600px; --smush-placeholder-aspect-ratio: 600\/400;\" \/><noscript><img decoding=\"async\" loading=\"lazy\" src=\"https:\/\/thewhisp.mommyish.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/02\/shutterstock_1157376808.jpg\" alt=\"Military Spouse Leaves Zero\" width=\"600\" height=\"400\" class=\"size-full wp-image-862499\" \/><\/noscript><figcaption id=\"caption-attachment-862499\" class=\"wp-caption-text\">Shutterstock<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n<p>Sadly, this &#8220;dependa&#8221; mindset isn&#8217;t uncommon. While not all military spouses believe they&#8217;re entitled to special treatment, some even believe their husband&#8217;s rank means they&#8217;re more deserving of special treatment than *other* military spouses. One Reddit user, <a href=\"https:\/\/www.reddit.com\/r\/ChoosingBeggars\/comments\/ejewev\/military_spouse_demanding_to_have_her_next_meal\/\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\" target=\"_blank\">Pieceman11<\/a>, said this opinion was very common in the military spouse community, who rationalize it by deciding that taking care of their family means they serve just as hard, if not harder than their husbands. Raising a family on one&#8217;s own is no small task, but single parents don&#8217;t walk around disrespecting servers because they feel entitled. Another Redditor wrote that &#8220;those spouse clubs are just an echo chamber where they all start to reinforce each other that this kinda shit like in the [original post] is ok.&#8221; <\/p>\n<h2>And These \u201dSpouse Clubs\u201d\u009d Have A Lot Of Other Issues<\/h2>\n<figure id=\"attachment_862491\" aria-describedby=\"caption-attachment-862491\" style=\"width: 600px\" class=\"wp-caption aligncenter\"><img decoding=\"async\" loading=\"lazy\" data-src=\"https:\/\/thewhisp.mommyish.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/02\/shutterstock_345818156.jpg\" alt=\"book club\" width=\"600\" height=\"400\" class=\"size-full wp-image-862491 lazyload\" src=\"data:image\/gif;base64,R0lGODlhAQABAAAAACH5BAEKAAEALAAAAAABAAEAAAICTAEAOw==\" style=\"--smush-placeholder-width: 600px; --smush-placeholder-aspect-ratio: 600\/400;\" \/><noscript><img decoding=\"async\" loading=\"lazy\" src=\"https:\/\/thewhisp.mommyish.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/02\/shutterstock_345818156.jpg\" alt=\"book club\" width=\"600\" height=\"400\" class=\"size-full wp-image-862491\" \/><\/noscript><figcaption id=\"caption-attachment-862491\" class=\"wp-caption-text\">Shutterstock<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n<p>Spouse clubs are groups of military spouses that meet regularly on-base for lunches or dinners, fundraise for charities and scholarships, and occasionally run on-base thrift stores, according to <a href=\"https:\/\/www.military.com\/spouse\/military-life\/spouse-groups\/how-to-join-a-military-spouse-club.html\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\" target=\"_blank\">Military.com<\/a>. These clubs are organized by a board of spouses, each with their own bylaws, but there&#8217;s very little military oversight. While it&#8217;s nice to have a support group, these clubs historically have had many issues, especially with excluding male military spouses. They were also typically split among officer spouses and enlisted spouses, although they&#8217;re supposedly becoming more inclusive. Although, if this entitled behavior is any indication, the apple may not fall far from the tree. <\/p>\n<h2>There\u2019s Even A Subreddit Dedicated to Cringeworthy Examples of Entitlement<\/h2>\n<figure id=\"attachment_862493\" aria-describedby=\"caption-attachment-862493\" style=\"width: 600px\" class=\"wp-caption aligncenter\"><img decoding=\"async\" loading=\"lazy\" data-src=\"https:\/\/thewhisp.mommyish.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/02\/shutterstock_788154133.jpg\" alt=\"Military Spouse Leaves Zero\" width=\"600\" height=\"400\" class=\"size-full wp-image-862493 lazyload\" src=\"data:image\/gif;base64,R0lGODlhAQABAAAAACH5BAEKAAEALAAAAAABAAEAAAICTAEAOw==\" style=\"--smush-placeholder-width: 600px; --smush-placeholder-aspect-ratio: 600\/400;\" \/><noscript><img decoding=\"async\" loading=\"lazy\" src=\"https:\/\/thewhisp.mommyish.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/02\/shutterstock_788154133.jpg\" alt=\"Military Spouse Leaves Zero\" width=\"600\" height=\"400\" class=\"size-full wp-image-862493\" \/><\/noscript><figcaption id=\"caption-attachment-862493\" class=\"wp-caption-text\">Shutterstock<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n<p>In case you thought there weren&#8217;t really that many entitled military spouses, there&#8217;s actually an entire subreddit dedicated to incidents similar to this military spouse&#8217;s receipt (which gets even worse when you hear her side of the story). The subreddit, called &#8220;<a href=\"https:\/\/www.reddit.com\/r\/justdependathings\/\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\" target=\"_blank\">Just Dependa Things<\/a>,&#8221; ranges from military girlfriends asking for people to pay for their wedding, military spouses buying &#8220;Military Spouse Medals&#8221; on the internet, requesting for horror movie posters to be taken down at their local food courts (that have nothing to do with the military), and wearing their spouse&#8217;s uniform shirts out shopping. <\/p>\n<h2>And There Are Countless Cringey Stories Just Like This One<\/h2>\n<figure id=\"attachment_862495\" aria-describedby=\"caption-attachment-862495\" style=\"width: 600px\" class=\"wp-caption aligncenter\"><img decoding=\"async\" loading=\"lazy\" data-src=\"https:\/\/thewhisp.mommyish.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/02\/reddit-2.jpg\" alt=\"reddit\" width=\"600\" height=\"400\" class=\"size-full wp-image-862495 lazyload\" src=\"data:image\/gif;base64,R0lGODlhAQABAAAAACH5BAEKAAEALAAAAAABAAEAAAICTAEAOw==\" style=\"--smush-placeholder-width: 600px; --smush-placeholder-aspect-ratio: 600\/400;\" \/><noscript><img decoding=\"async\" loading=\"lazy\" src=\"https:\/\/thewhisp.mommyish.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/02\/reddit-2.jpg\" alt=\"reddit\" width=\"600\" height=\"400\" class=\"size-full wp-image-862495\" \/><\/noscript><figcaption id=\"caption-attachment-862495\" class=\"wp-caption-text\"><a href=\"https:\/\/www.reddit.com\/r\/justdependathings\/comments\/e98dr0\/smells_like_fresh_dependa\/\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\" target=\"_blank\">Reddit<\/a><\/figcaption><\/figure>\n<p>One post on Just Dependa Things titled &#8220;<a href=\"https:\/\/www.reddit.com\/r\/justdependathings\/comments\/f9w95o\/found_in_reviews_on_a_restaurant_back_home\/\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\" target=\"_blank\">Found in reviews on a restaurant back home.<\/a>&#8221; shows a one-star review for a local restaurant. The reviewer explains that they previously gave the establishment a five-star rating for food and service, but have changed it to one-star because they no longer offer a military spouse discount. This poster didn&#8217;t consider that this restaurant probably could no longer afford to offer this discount, but commenters did. One user told a story about a restaurant that never offered a discount because it was so cheap and was then forced to raise prices after being pressured into offering a military spouse discount&#8230; which then made the price of their food the same as it always was for these military spouses before they were given a discount, changing nothing for the spouses and making things worse for everyone else.   <\/p>\n<h2>And Not All Military Spouses Think This Way<\/h2>\n<figure id=\"attachment_862494\" aria-describedby=\"caption-attachment-862494\" style=\"width: 600px\" class=\"wp-caption aligncenter\"><img decoding=\"async\" loading=\"lazy\" data-src=\"https:\/\/thewhisp.mommyish.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/02\/reddit-1.jpg\" alt=\"Military Spouse Leaves Zero\" width=\"600\" height=\"400\" class=\"size-full wp-image-862494 lazyload\" src=\"data:image\/gif;base64,R0lGODlhAQABAAAAACH5BAEKAAEALAAAAAABAAEAAAICTAEAOw==\" style=\"--smush-placeholder-width: 600px; --smush-placeholder-aspect-ratio: 600\/400;\" \/><noscript><img decoding=\"async\" loading=\"lazy\" src=\"https:\/\/thewhisp.mommyish.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/02\/reddit-1.jpg\" alt=\"Military Spouse Leaves Zero\" width=\"600\" height=\"400\" class=\"size-full wp-image-862494\" \/><\/noscript><figcaption id=\"caption-attachment-862494\" class=\"wp-caption-text\"><a href=\"https:\/\/www.reddit.com\/r\/justdependathings\/comments\/e98dr0\/smells_like_fresh_dependa\/\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\" target=\"_blank\">Reddit<\/a><\/figcaption><\/figure>\n<p>Still, there&#8217;s no reason to stereotype every military spouse as a &#8220;dependa.&#8221; Most military spouses don&#8217;t approve of this behavior, but even some non-dependa spouses enter the fray by attacking dependa spouses with the same vitriol the dependas unleash on others. It&#8217;s bonkers to imply that military spouses &#8220;serve&#8221; in the same way that their active-duty spouses do, but one dependa <a href=\"https:\/\/www.reddit.com\/r\/justdependathings\/comments\/e98dr0\/smells_like_fresh_dependa\/\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\" target=\"_blank\">commenter<\/a> did rightfully point out that we should &#8220;lift each other up&#8221; and &#8220;educate, without belittling&#8221; because &#8220;this animosity and jumping down each other&#8217;s throats, it&#8217;s unnecessary!&#8221; We can&#8217;t change this culture of entitlement by being cruel, although stories like this non-tipping spouse make us understand why people lash out&#8230; <\/p>\n<h2>Some Military Families Choose Not To Use Their Discount At All<\/h2>\n<figure id=\"attachment_862496\" aria-describedby=\"caption-attachment-862496\" style=\"width: 600px\" class=\"wp-caption aligncenter\"><img decoding=\"async\" loading=\"lazy\" data-src=\"https:\/\/thewhisp.mommyish.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/02\/shutterstock_568213831.jpg\" alt=\"military\" width=\"600\" height=\"400\" class=\"size-full wp-image-862496 lazyload\" src=\"data:image\/gif;base64,R0lGODlhAQABAAAAACH5BAEKAAEALAAAAAABAAEAAAICTAEAOw==\" style=\"--smush-placeholder-width: 600px; --smush-placeholder-aspect-ratio: 600\/400;\" \/><noscript><img decoding=\"async\" loading=\"lazy\" src=\"https:\/\/thewhisp.mommyish.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/02\/shutterstock_568213831.jpg\" alt=\"military\" width=\"600\" height=\"400\" class=\"size-full wp-image-862496\" \/><\/noscript><figcaption id=\"caption-attachment-862496\" class=\"wp-caption-text\">Shutterstock<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n<p>On the bright side, there are many military spouses who are perfectly nice and are the opposite of entitled. One Reddit commenter, <a href=\"https:\/\/www.reddit.com\/r\/justdependathings\/comments\/f9w95o\/found_in_reviews_on_a_restaurant_back_home\/\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\" target=\"_blank\">KJParker888<\/a>, mentioned that many service members don&#8217;t ask for the discount at all, inspiring a string of responses from service members and military spouses that refrain from using their discount altogether or only use it for special occasions, like Disneyland tickets. One user, Brightspt2, mentioned that her military spouse mother only ever sees the discount as a pleasant bonus when she stumbles upon it, while user iggypop19 questions why cops, firefighters, paramedics, and nurses don&#8217;t get discounts for putting themselves in danger or saving lives here at home. <\/p>\n<h2>Making Things Worse, This Spouse Went Off On Snapchat<\/h2>\n<figure id=\"attachment_862487\" aria-describedby=\"caption-attachment-862487\" style=\"width: 620px\" class=\"wp-caption aligncenter\"><img decoding=\"async\" loading=\"lazy\" data-src=\"https:\/\/thewhisp.mommyish.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/02\/Untitled2-640x788.png\" alt=\"Military Spouse Leaves Zero\" width=\"620\" height=\"763\" class=\"size-large wp-image-862487 lazyload\" src=\"data:image\/gif;base64,R0lGODlhAQABAAAAACH5BAEKAAEALAAAAAABAAEAAAICTAEAOw==\" style=\"--smush-placeholder-width: 620px; --smush-placeholder-aspect-ratio: 620\/763;\" \/><noscript><img decoding=\"async\" loading=\"lazy\" src=\"https:\/\/thewhisp.mommyish.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/02\/Untitled2-640x788.png\" alt=\"Military Spouse Leaves Zero\" width=\"620\" height=\"763\" class=\"size-large wp-image-862487\" \/><\/noscript><figcaption id=\"caption-attachment-862487\" class=\"wp-caption-text\"><a href=\"https:\/\/www.reddit.com\/r\/trashy\/comments\/ejfmt7\/entitled_military_spouse_demands_free_meals\/\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\" target=\"_blank\">Reddit<\/a><\/figcaption><\/figure>\n<p>You may think that this non-tipping military spouse wasn&#8217;t acting too terribly compared to other &#8220;dependas&#8221; on the internet, but it gets worse. This woman shared a Snapchat of her receipt captioned, &#8220;When I became a military spouse I thought I would get free stuff WTF&#8221; which weirdly implies that she married a service member for the perks. &#8220;Military spouses deserve drinks for free f*ck [sic] this place!! OMG F*CK [sic] THIS PLACE!! We serve our *sses [sic] off way more than anyone!!&#8221; So, in case anyone thought her smiley face was anything less than passive-aggressive, now you know. <\/p>\n<h2>And Her Rant Went Viral<\/h2>\n<figure id=\"attachment_862498\" aria-describedby=\"caption-attachment-862498\" style=\"width: 600px\" class=\"wp-caption aligncenter\"><img decoding=\"async\" loading=\"lazy\" data-src=\"https:\/\/thewhisp.mommyish.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/02\/shutterstock_294147005.jpg\" alt=\"viral\" width=\"600\" height=\"400\" class=\"size-full wp-image-862498 lazyload\" src=\"data:image\/gif;base64,R0lGODlhAQABAAAAACH5BAEKAAEALAAAAAABAAEAAAICTAEAOw==\" style=\"--smush-placeholder-width: 600px; --smush-placeholder-aspect-ratio: 600\/400;\" \/><noscript><img decoding=\"async\" loading=\"lazy\" src=\"https:\/\/thewhisp.mommyish.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/02\/shutterstock_294147005.jpg\" alt=\"viral\" width=\"600\" height=\"400\" class=\"size-full wp-image-862498\" \/><\/noscript><figcaption id=\"caption-attachment-862498\" class=\"wp-caption-text\">Shutterstock<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n<p>Naturally, this rant went viral. Her terrible take was mocked on Reddit&#8217;s \/r\/ChoosingBeggars and \/r\/trashy before the night was over, with many former active-duty service people and their spouses expressing their distaste for her sentiments. The screenshot was upvoted 52.3k times on \/r\/trashy and 100k times on \/r\/ChoosingBeggars, showing just how annoyed people were with this military spouse&#8217;s attitude. Some people on Reddit have wondered if this screenshot is a hoax, but regardless of whether this military spouse went off on Snapchat, the dependa mindset is very real. <\/p>\n<h2>You Shouldn\u2019t Become A Military Spouse For The Perks<\/h2>\n<figure id=\"attachment_862489\" aria-describedby=\"caption-attachment-862489\" style=\"width: 600px\" class=\"wp-caption aligncenter\"><img decoding=\"async\" loading=\"lazy\" data-src=\"https:\/\/thewhisp.mommyish.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/02\/e3g6wx2o6k841.jpg\" alt=\"Military Spouse Leaves Zero\" width=\"600\" height=\"400\" class=\"size-full wp-image-862489 lazyload\" src=\"data:image\/gif;base64,R0lGODlhAQABAAAAACH5BAEKAAEALAAAAAABAAEAAAICTAEAOw==\" style=\"--smush-placeholder-width: 600px; --smush-placeholder-aspect-ratio: 600\/400;\" \/><noscript><img decoding=\"async\" loading=\"lazy\" src=\"https:\/\/thewhisp.mommyish.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/02\/e3g6wx2o6k841.jpg\" alt=\"Military Spouse Leaves Zero\" width=\"600\" height=\"400\" class=\"size-full wp-image-862489\" \/><\/noscript><figcaption id=\"caption-attachment-862489\" class=\"wp-caption-text\"><a href=\"https:\/\/www.reddit.com\/r\/trashy\/comments\/ejfmt7\/entitled_military_spouse_demands_free_meals\/\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\" target=\"_blank\">Reddit<\/a><\/figcaption><\/figure>\n<p>At the end of the day, what this military spouse did was wrong. Making things even worse is that she did it for the wrong reasons, too. While there&#8217;s never an excuse for shorting a server on their tip, this military spouse implied that she became a military spouse because she thought she would get &#8220;free stuff.&#8221; The life of a military spouse is a hard one, and any benefits military spouses, their children, or their service member partners receive is largely an attempt to make a difficult situation a little easier, because military families and veterans need our support, as do many struggling people. <\/p>\n<h2>You Should Do It For Love<\/h2>\n<figure id=\"attachment_862500\" aria-describedby=\"caption-attachment-862500\" style=\"width: 600px\" class=\"wp-caption aligncenter\"><img decoding=\"async\" loading=\"lazy\" data-src=\"https:\/\/thewhisp.mommyish.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/02\/shutterstock_1486347662.jpg\" alt=\"military\" width=\"600\" height=\"400\" class=\"size-full wp-image-862500 lazyload\" src=\"data:image\/gif;base64,R0lGODlhAQABAAAAACH5BAEKAAEALAAAAAABAAEAAAICTAEAOw==\" style=\"--smush-placeholder-width: 600px; --smush-placeholder-aspect-ratio: 600\/400;\" \/><noscript><img decoding=\"async\" loading=\"lazy\" src=\"https:\/\/thewhisp.mommyish.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/02\/shutterstock_1486347662.jpg\" alt=\"military\" width=\"600\" height=\"400\" class=\"size-full wp-image-862500\" \/><\/noscript><figcaption id=\"caption-attachment-862500\" class=\"wp-caption-text\">Shutterstock<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n<p>If you become a military spouse, it shouldn&#8217;t be for the discounts at stores and restaurants, the employment initiatives from companies like Starbucks, Microsoft, and Hilton, or respect from other civilians. It especially shouldn&#8217;t be to get &#8220;free stuff,&#8221; which was never promised by anyone. It should be because you&#8217;re in love with someone in the military and prepared to face all that entails. Marriage is a fragile, beautiful commitment to another person that shouldn&#8217;t be taken lightly and that requires a real understanding of what supporting another person means and having that person support you. <\/p>\n<h2>And They Don\u2019t Serve More Than \u201dAnyone\u201d\u009d<\/h2>\n<figure id=\"attachment_862501\" aria-describedby=\"caption-attachment-862501\" style=\"width: 600px\" class=\"wp-caption aligncenter\"><img decoding=\"async\" loading=\"lazy\" data-src=\"https:\/\/thewhisp.mommyish.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/02\/shutterstock_659339296.jpg\" alt=\"Military Spouse Leaves Zero\" width=\"600\" height=\"400\" class=\"size-full wp-image-862501 lazyload\" src=\"data:image\/gif;base64,R0lGODlhAQABAAAAACH5BAEKAAEALAAAAAABAAEAAAICTAEAOw==\" style=\"--smush-placeholder-width: 600px; --smush-placeholder-aspect-ratio: 600\/400;\" \/><noscript><img decoding=\"async\" loading=\"lazy\" src=\"https:\/\/thewhisp.mommyish.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/02\/shutterstock_659339296.jpg\" alt=\"Military Spouse Leaves Zero\" width=\"600\" height=\"400\" class=\"size-full wp-image-862501\" \/><\/noscript><figcaption id=\"caption-attachment-862501\" class=\"wp-caption-text\">Shutterstock<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n<p>Saying that she serves more than &#8220;anyone&#8221; isn&#8217;t just insulting to police officers, teachers, nurses, firefighters, food service workers, single parents, and all of the other people who sacrifice for their communities and families. It&#8217;s also insulting to her military partner who has given her this perceived clout in the first place, and it makes it seem as if her heart is not in the right place. An entitled outlook saying she deserves drinks for free is a disservice to her spouse and make it seem as if love wasn&#8217;t the reason she became a military spouse in the first place. <\/p>\n<h2>Hopefully, This Spouse Gets The Help She Needs &#038; Learns To Help Others<\/h2>\n<figure id=\"attachment_862502\" aria-describedby=\"caption-attachment-862502\" style=\"width: 600px\" class=\"wp-caption aligncenter\"><img decoding=\"async\" loading=\"lazy\" data-src=\"https:\/\/thewhisp.mommyish.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/02\/shutterstock_1106697716.jpg\" alt=\"military\" width=\"600\" height=\"400\" class=\"size-full wp-image-862502 lazyload\" src=\"data:image\/gif;base64,R0lGODlhAQABAAAAACH5BAEKAAEALAAAAAABAAEAAAICTAEAOw==\" style=\"--smush-placeholder-width: 600px; --smush-placeholder-aspect-ratio: 600\/400;\" \/><noscript><img decoding=\"async\" loading=\"lazy\" src=\"https:\/\/thewhisp.mommyish.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/02\/shutterstock_1106697716.jpg\" alt=\"military\" width=\"600\" height=\"400\" class=\"size-full wp-image-862502\" \/><\/noscript><figcaption id=\"caption-attachment-862502\" class=\"wp-caption-text\">Shutterstock<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n<p>Positive change doesn&#8217;t come from going on the attack, ironically enough. It comes from being compassionate and leading by example. Hopefully, this woman and other dependas like her encounter a change in their mindset through positive examples and a shift in culture that allows them to appreciate their spouse&#8217;s service while echoing their sacrifice with a benevolence of their own in line with the Army&#8217;s Core Values of selfless service, respect, honor, and integrity. Bullying others anonymously online will just harden their hearts to actual change. We hope this military spouse gets the help she needs and learns to spread love instead of toxicity. <\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Members of the armed forces and their spouses do a lot to help our country. In this age of&#8230;<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1000174,"featured_media":210485,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_kad_blocks_custom_css":"","_kad_blocks_head_custom_js":"","_kad_blocks_body_custom_js":"","_kad_blocks_footer_custom_js":"","_kadence_starter_templates_imported_post":false,"_kad_post_transparent":"","_kad_post_title":"","_kad_post_layout":"","_kad_post_sidebar_id":"","_kad_post_content_style":"","_kad_post_vertical_padding":"","_kad_post_feature":"","_kad_post_feature_position":"","_kad_post_header":false,"_kad_post_footer":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[5540],"tags":[],"taxonomy_info":{"category":[{"value":5540,"label":"Weird News"}]},"featured_image_src_large":["https:\/\/mommyish.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/03\/waiter.jpg",640,400,false],"author_info":{"display_name":"Amanda Walden","author_link":"https:\/\/mommyish.com\/author\/awalden\/"},"comment_info":0,"category_info":[{"term_id":5540,"name":"Weird News","slug":"weird-news","term_group":0,"term_taxonomy_id":5621,"taxonomy":"category","description":"","parent":0,"count":199,"filter":"raw","cat_ID":5540,"category_count":199,"category_description":"","cat_name":"Weird News","category_nicename":"weird-news","category_parent":0}],"tag_info":false,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/mommyish.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/210483"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/mommyish.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/mommyish.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/mommyish.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1000174"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/mommyish.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=210483"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/mommyish.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/210483\/revisions"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/mommyish.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/210485"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/mommyish.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=210483"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/mommyish.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=210483"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/mommyish.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=210483"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}