Open Thread: What Would You Change About Your Birth Experience?

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When I look back on all the ideas I had about how my first labor would go, I see that none of my ideas came to fruition. Well, none of them except the most important one — that I would eventually have a healthy baby in my arms.

I’ve spent years coming to terms with the idea that things don’t always go as planned, mostly by reaching out to other women through my writing — to let them know their feelings matter. To let people know that you can have birth disappointment and that’s okay — it doesn’t make you a selfish monster. And also to weigh in on the idea that, yes, a healthy baby is really all that matters. But that doesn’t mean that you aren’t entitled to feel like you wish it could have been different.

So – if you could change anything about your birth experience, what would it be? I’ll start:

I hated the hospital I ended up delivering in in Brooklyn. My room was dark, my nurses were gruff, and there was no TV – just a giant clock on the wall in front of me. It was far from my house, I was reeling from the emergency c-section and I felt lonely. Hard to explain – my family was there. I just felt like I was out-to-sea. So, if I could change anything, I would skip the necessity for an emergency c-section, because it took me a long time to recover from the feelings that brought up.

Your turn!