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This Video of a Toddler Flopping Around in Raw Eggs Will Make You Laugh and Gag

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(YouTube / That One Mom Blog)

Toddlers are, perhaps, the worst creatures on earth. I’ve owned a few of them, so I can say that with absolute confidence. Luckily, none of mine ever smashed an entire carton of eggs on the floor and then swam around in it (yet). Unfortunately for one mom, she can no longer make this claim.

Bear, a human toddler, was left in the kitchen by himself while his mother cleaned up another child’s room. FIRST MISTAKE! Never leave a toddler alone unless they are handcuffed or restrained in some way. While mom cleaned, Bear apparently climbed into the refrigerator and dumped a full carton of eggs on the floor. And then, because he is a toddler, he decided it would be fun to flop around in the chicken embryos and excuse me while I go barf.

If one of my kids did this, I would be screaming and vomiting and probably lighting my house on fire. But not Bear’s mom! Bear’s mom decided it would be funny to film her son covering himself and her kitchen in salmonella.

[youtube https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3Ue37TWfLEU]

She literally just chuckles while he bats around an egg yolk. I can’t, you guys. I can’t.

Bear, who is in a diaper, a tank top, and one shoe, eventually tries to climb back into the fridge, slipping and falling because he’s, you know, covered in egg goo. “We have to pick up your sister in ten minutes!” the mom exclaims, doing absolutely nothing to indicate that she’s going to stop her child from slip-sliding around the house.

I have to assume that she eventually cleaned up the mess, but will she ever be able to look at Bear without remembering him covered in egg guts? Fingers crossed.