Unbearable: My Feud With Pregnancy.Org – And How Theyâ€™re Responding
Having a child is usually a happy time in a womanâ€™s life. Unfortunately, as we wait longer to have children, infertility and trouble conceiving can become a part of the family making process. Unbearable addresses these difficulties.
Months ago, I wrote a post about pregnancy and parenting websites, and how hard it is to get them out of your inbox after you’ve had a miscarriage. You can click the unsubscribe button at the bottom of the page. You can tell Gmail that it’s spam. And yet, because all of those websites give your information to advertisers, there still ends up being an intense of email all centered around your upcoming child. When you’ve lost that upcoming child, it’s pretty hard to handle.
To be honest, the baby email had died down for me. I’m not sure if Pregnancy.com ever saw my post, though they are the ones that I mentioned in the headline. Or maybe I had finally unsubscribed to everything a sufficient amount of times to let them know that I meant business.
I guess that’s why the latest round of emails from another parenting website caught me off guard. All of the sudden, at the end of September, I got an email from Pregnancy.org saying, “Hey Lindsay, we haven’t seen you Pregnancy.org since forever, and we miss you!” It was all cheery and inviting me back, ready to find out how my baby was doing. In that moment, the fact that my original due date had past hit me. If my pregnancy hadn’t been in my Fallopian tube, I would have a newborn right now.
I’m almost amazed that I didn’t think about it sooner. I talk about my experience pretty frequently, given my job. My due date was August 15th, which happens to be my mother’s birthday. I can admit that on that day, I wasn’t thinking about anything other than how awesome my mom is. But once this idea hit, the idea that I should have a baby right now, it was pretty brutal.
I responded to that Pregnancy.org email. I emailed their customer service with what I thought was a completely appropriate response. “Are you fucking kidding me?” Then I linked to my post about breaking up with pregnancy websites.
Apparently that was not a clear message. Or the person didn’t click on the link and just thought I was extremely aggressive spam. A couple days later, they emailed me again. This time it was about Spina Bifida awareness, which is obviously a great cause. But just seeing the name in my email was infuriating. I took to Twitter.