Childrearing

I’m Terrified Of Raising My Black Son In This World

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How will I explain to him eventually that the beautiful half of him that came from his black father is going to make his life harder and there’s no explanation, justification or logic behind it? That there are people that will simply hate him and suspect the worst of him? That he will need to justify his every move and be forever responsible for making the white people around him feel comfortable and safe – or else.

I have a black son that I am raising in a state that thinks his life isn’t worth shit. I have friends so used to this type of news that they weren’t even surprised by the verdict. I don’t want my friends to live in a world like this, I don’t want my husband to live in a world like this,  and I damn sure don’t want my kids to. I have no idea what to do about any of this. The only thing I’ve been able to do so far is open my mouth and say,

This is wrong.

This is racist.

This is fucked up.

A young man who was doing nothing but walking home with some snacks in his hands is dead. We have a murderer who hasn’t expressed a second of remorse and a defense team that was disturbingly giddy about the verdict. We have a juror who thinks a vigilante who gunned down an unarmed child had a heart that was “in the right place,” and we have a huge segment of the public who simply doesn’t care that a 17-year-old was gunned down by a man who had no business following him or questioning him in any way.

I’m just completely at a loss.

The fact that there are people who can look at all the details of this case and truly believe race wasn’t a factor makes me terrified to raise my son in this world. I’d rather be surrounded by blatant racists, rather than hoards of silent, indifferent ones justifying the death of a young, unarmed man and never seeing a racist when they look in the mirror.

(photo: facebook)

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