Childrearing

I’m Already Fretting About All The Attention My Unborn Second Child Is Going To Get

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I’ve been sappy like this at all of the milestones in my child’s young life; when he started to eat real food, when he started to crawl, when he started to walk. Now he is going to be the older sibling. He’s going to have a younger sister to look after. He’s going to become a teacher and co-conspirator. It’s funny that I am predominantly thinking about my second child’s existence in the way that it is going to affect my first. Is that a natural reaction? I have no idea.

There is something I have repeatedly heard from parents with more than one child – You can’t imagine loving anything as much as your first child, and then boom! It happens again. That is amazing and terrifying at the same time. I’m already walking around with my heart outside my body. I’m constantly thinking about my son – his happiness, his health. I can’t imagine that this is going to be times two, now. It’s almost unfathomable.

But at these times when I get sentimental and overwhelmed, I remember that I get to do it all over again. This little girl is going to come into my life and nothing is going to be the same. My son changed my life in a million ways. He definitely made it more challenging, but also gave me something incredible that I’m not sure I could even put into words. I get to relive all of those milestones that slipped away so quickly.

I get to have an infant staring into my eyes for hours on end. I get to see all the ways her little personality is going to unfold. I get to do it all over again – and this time, my son gets to do it with me. He won’t remember a life without his sister in it – just like I don’t remember a life without mine. They’ll get to move through their lives together.

I realize now that I’m overwhelmed by the thought of her being here because she isn’t here yet. As soon as she’s in my arms she’ll be inextricably a part of our family. As soon as they begin to grow together, my son won’t be able to imagine a life without his sister. And I won’t be able to picture my family any other way.

(photo: Jaimie Duplass / Shutterstock)

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