When I found out my first child was a girl, I was a little freaked out. I grew up with brothers and though my gut told me she would be a girl, part of me was sort of hoping I would have all boys because I felt more comfortable with the idea of raising them. One would think that being a woman myself would make me capable but really, it just made me all the more aware of how awkward it can be to raise a girl. There are so many question marks and so many milestones that parents of boys do not have to grapple with. In those first weeks after finding out I would have a daughter, I started to imagine the future: dating, gynecologist visits, shopping in the Juniors section and gently talking her out of crop tops- ugh. Some of the girly milestones are a bit daunting to me, if I’m being honest, but they will be here before I know it. Here are eight things every mother will have to “let” her daughter do at some point:
1. Shave Her Legs
For me, this rule will be pretty loose- I am Italian and I totally don’t want my daughter to be embarrassed in gym class one day if her legs are super furry. I will leave it up to her and also, when I think she can use a razor without causing major blood shed. I still have tiny scars from my ill-fated fifth grade attempts.
2. Get Contact Lenses
I never dealt with this but I had many girlfriends who did. Some parents seem to get very nervous about it and don’t want their little girls looking too grown-up.
3. Wear Make-Up
I know moms who have very strong feelings about make-up. Personally, I am not too worried and will probably let my daughter wear make-up to school if she asks as long as she is past 11 or 12. Emphasis will be placed on not needing it, but wearing it because it’s fun.
4. Buy A Bra
Obviously, there comes a point where there is no question that a young girl needs a bra or cami. Right now, my daughter is only seven and definitely has no need but she is fascinated by the teeny training bra display at Target so, it’s on the horizon for us very soon.
5. Discuss Birth Control
I am not too worried about this conversation but obviously, it’s a big one for a lot of parents. I am more concerned that she is having sex for the right reasons and not feeling pressured.
6. Get Her Hair Dyed
I will probably say no to this one because it can be expensive to keep up and unless my daughter has a job and pays for it herself, I don’t think I would be willing. I may also raise an eyebrow at colors not found in nature but we will cross that bridge when we come to it. Having pink streaks in her hair is certainly not the worst thing she could do but it wouldn’t be my favorite.
7. Wax Her Facial Hair
I have written before about how I will help my daughter with facial hair removal whenever she is old enough to notice and ask about it. I still stand by that. However, I have no plans to point it out to her. As long as she is not bothered by it, I will leave it be.
8. Go To The Mall Without An Adult
Of course, this is a decision parents of boys need to make as well but we all know it’s a bit different for girls. As so many things are.