8 Tricks Your Dog Will Learn Faster Than Your Kids
When I was in high school, my family got an awesome dog, Dexter Doodle. He was a smart dog, with a repertoire of tricks that made him popular after dinner entertainment at family gatherings. After teaching my dog how to play dead and dance in a circle I thought showing my children how to use a spoon would be a piece of cake, but I was wrong. This list of things that dogs learn faster than children will make you wonder why we don’t have obedience school for tiny humans.
1. Sit
This is the first command most dogs learn, but one that kids rarely learn ever. Whether they’re in the stroller, a shopping cart or one of those restaurant high chairs that always seem to have at least one broken strap, chances are if you need your child to sit down, they will chose that moment to stand their ground. Literally.
2. Stay
Sometimes I’d take the dog out with me to the mailbox without a leash and as long as the Greyhound from down the street didn’t walk by, it was fine. I put leash backpacks on my children and I still can’t get them to stay in one place long enough for me to grab the diaper bag from the trunk.
3. Don’t pee on the floor
House training my dog was a process, but at least there are those big blue pads to put down and cover the floor. I’m in the midst of potty training two toddlers and I’ve yet to find a plastic potty big enough to prevent having to mop the floors each time they practice. Maybe those pet pads aren’t such a bad idea. Hmmm.
4. Come
My dog did this without an issue. Most of the time I can barely get the kids off my lap long enough to make myself a sandwich. But when I actually want them to come to me for a fresh diaper or to put on socks I’m invisible.
5. Leave it
My dog would leave a treat balanced on his nose for eternity if I asked him to, even though he really, really wanted it. But trying to protect my kids from potential death by lamp cord strangulation takes all of my willpower, no matter how many times I beg them not to touch.
6. Speak
Let’s be honest, it’s fun to show off when your child learns a new song or phrase. But even though they spent the entire car ride to Grandma’s singing Let it Go complete with jazz hands, now that the time to really shine is here, they’re frozen. My dog learned to “sing” with me in a single afternoon and never had stage fright over showing off his talents.
7. Get down
My dog would listen (most of the time) when I told him to get down off the couch. My children treat every opportunity that my back is turned to climb on top of the dining room table and practice their soft shoe.
8. Get in your bed
My dog had a bed in each room of the house, and would go there when told so he wasn’t underfoot, no matter what exciting things were going. The only times I expect my kids to get in bed are for naps and nighttime sleep, so you would think they’d be tired and want to listen to me, but then you’d be wrong.
(image: otsphoto/Shutterstock)
