Texas Rejects New AP History Course For Being Too Negative About America’s Horrible History

On Wednesday, the Texas Board of Education voted to teach its AP History students according to state-mandated curriculum, instead of the one that will be used by AP History students across the country to prepare them for the national test. Their reason is that the new AP History curriculum is filled with liberal bias and is too focused on the negative parts of United States History. Said the rest of the world and all people of color: “Ha! That’s a really great joke, Texas.”

Members of the College Board, who designed the new course, emphasize that the new curriculum is a framework and is meant to allow flexibility for different states in course design. Texas, however, is choosing to reject the framework completely and teach according to Texas state standards, which also prohibit (by law, folks) the teaching of the federal government’s Common Core teaching standards.

Texas, where the state motto is: “Fuck all y’all.”

So what in particular does the Texas Board of Education find objectionable about the new AP History framework? In an open letter to the president and CEO of the College Board, opponents said that:

The new Framework inculcates a consistently negative view of American history by highlighting oppressors and exploiters while ignoring the dreamers and innovators who built our country.

Yes. Yes. The dreamers and the innovators who brought slavery to our great nation and with it, dominated an entire race of people. Got it. What else?

 …the colonists are portrayed as bigots who developed ”a rigid racial hierarchy” that was in turn derived from ”a strong belief in British racial and cultural superiority.”

Honestly. Because how big a role has racism and bigotry played in American history? What’s that? Most of it? Hm. What else you got?

 …the Framework makes no mention of the sacrifices America’s Greatest Generation made to rescue much of the world from a long night of Nazi and Japanese tyranny. Instead, the Framework focuses solely on the negative aspects of America’s involvement in the war…

What?! The negative aspects of war?! Well, I just won’t have it. What about all of the positive deaths of innocent 18-year-old boys on foreign shores? And how we didn’t even get involved in the war until we got attacked at Pearl Harbor, because that’s how heroes respond to foreign genocide. Come on, College Board.

Now, Texas also argues, and rightly, that the coursework leaves out important subjects like the freaking Holocaust and Martin Luther King Jr. And I agree, that does seem enormously messed up. But it is my belief, rightly or wrongly, that the inclusion of the Holocaust would focus on how our brave American soldiers liberated concentration camps in Germany. If the point is to include important topics only to spin them into an example of America’s greatness, then I don’t think that helps provide an honest look at our country’s history.

In fact, the new AP History framework is also described by some opponents as “mind control” from the federal government, meant to teach students to dislike basic American principles, such as capitalism. That is quite an influence for a high school exam.

So Texas is going to teach it’s kids about great American wartime victories and other historical achievements. And when they are asked about us dropping the atomic bomb, these students will say, “But didn’t that clear a lot of land that could then be used for businesses?” Or, in response to a question about Japanese internment during the World War II, they can state, “The Pacific Coast is lovely and offers fresh seafood.”

Jesus, Texas. This blind crush on America is getting a little embarrassing.