Terrible DIY Thanksgiving Decorations That Will Leave Guests Saying “Um, Is That A Tampon?”

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Thanksgiving is a challenging enough holiday as it is, what with the elaborate cooking that has to please a variety of palates and the family visitors, and maybe even a random non-family guest who makes you even more nervous about the whole deal. So why have we now thrown in the extra pressure of creating an elaborate “tablescape?” Shelter mags and sites, Pinterest and Instagram have begun treating Thanksgiving centerpieces and place settings like they’re a for a freaking wedding. And you can’t just buy the blasted things, you’re supposed to make them by hand, possibly with the help of small woodland creatures or weirdly dexterous children. Then you’re faced with the dilemma of whether to clear your beautiful creations when it’s time to eat, or serve everything somewhere else and hoping no one spills on your work of art halfway through the meal, which is around when everyone’s going start getting up and meandering toward the couch anyway.

Here we present to you some examples of ill-advised Thanksgiving table decorations, so thoughtfully provided by the Internet.

1. Unsanitary Napkin Rings


What a cute DIY project, made from things found next to your very own toilet! And then decorated with little fake pinecones that bear a disturbing resemblance to turds!

2. Harvest 9-1-1

Wheat-centerpiece-on-fire(Image via

At first glance, this is a lovely centerpiece. And its simplicity is alluring. But anyone else hope the fire extinguisher is within arm’s reach of the table? The pilgrims probably could have told you that hay and candles are a terrible idea.

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