Surprise! Bad Parenting Decisions Are Coming In ‘Bridget Jones 3’
It’s official: Bridget Jones is returning to the big screen. Entertainment Weekly has confirmed the rumors, which have been circulating since 2009, that there will be a third installment of the
horrid popular title (Bridget Jones’s Diary was released in 2001, followed by Bridget Jones: The Edge Of Reason in 2004).
Bridget Jones costar Colin Firth â€“ he plays Mark Darcy â€“ pretty much gave the plot away when he told Access Hollywood: â€œI can tell you that Bridget [Renee Zellweger] and Mark canâ€™t have children, I think thatâ€™s the way it goes on. So then she makes the huge mistake of going back to Daniel Cleaver [Hugh Grant‘s character]Â for long enough to get pregnant. And I think he dumps her, and sheâ€™s left stranded, and guess who comes back to rescue her?â€
I am praying that Firth was only joking. Because, really, how many times can one plot be recycled over and over again (desperate Bridget chases after Daniel, he’s a dick, Daniel rescues her)? Even with what little info we have on the flick â€“ and let’s assume for a moment that Firth’s plot is accurate â€“ I can say with 100 percent certainty that Bridget Jones will be the worst fictional mommy role model ever.
If you ask me, Renee Zellweger’s character as a desperate singleton in the original Bridget Jones’s Diary was totally irrelevant even back in 2001. I don’t care that the movie was critically acclaimed and that women swore it captured their lives (blah blah blah). Bridget is nothing more than an extreme example of a weak and pathetic woman with a major body-image problem and zero self-worth (this coming from someone who couldn’t get enough of Sex and The City). I can’t even imagine what kind of crappy mother she’ll be in this new installment. And I’ll probably never find out since I have no intention of seeing it (until it plays on an airplane screen in front of my face â€“ on mute â€“ five years later. Then I’ll peek).
All this to say that if Bridget becomes the same type mom as she was as a single woman â€“ that is to say pathetic and totally annoying â€“ you’d be best off to leave your partner at home if you have any hope of getting knocked up yourself. Because once the guys get a load of this baby, they will run for the hills. And I can’t say I’ll blame them.