STFU Parents: Why Parents’ Spelling Mahtters On Facebook
If there’s one thing that makes me laugh while weeping for future generations, it’s poor spelling and grammar on social media. I know it’s petty to laugh since some people don’t know the basic rules, but because I grew up with an English teacher for a mother, I find that it’s nearly impossible not to. The errors practically shout at me when I go through submissions, and over time my “Spelling Matters” folder has become somewhat of a happy place. Whenever I’m feeling low or overwhelmed with work, I take a peek at these submissions and instantly feel better. It’s not that I think good spellers are better than those who aren’t, per se; it’s just that I consider spelling to be such an essential part of the communication process that the typos give me a laugh. One misspelled word can change the meaning of a status update or comment to hilarious effect, and today I wanted to celebrate those mistakes with a round-up of examples.
Of course, there are several reasons people might misspell a word on social media. Their phone might auto correct, they might not have learned English as a first language, or they might just not care about the differences between your and you’re. Some people know the rules of grammar and choose to ignore them out of laziness, and I understand that, but that doesn’t mean I agree with it. That said, the examples today are not “lazy” errors; they’re mistakes made by people who don’t know any better, and that’s why they’re so sadly amusing. I almost want to personally award these people with some kind of anti-spelling bee certificate that says, “Congradulations! Your a winner!” Proper spelling and grammar may not be wholly necessary skills in life, but they sure don’t hurt. Let’s take a look at a few of the reasons why I think they matter:
1. Too vs. To
Patsy’s son may be smart, but she’s not making a very convincing case here. Also, I’m pretty sure my cat can search for videos on YouTube. I’m not saying that qualifying intelligence by how a child uses technology is a bad idea, but it probably shouldn’t be the standard.
2. Roll vs. Role
You know what scares the he’ll, er, hell out of me? This exchange. I guess my roll in life is to for ever correct parents on the Face Book.
3. The Problem With Slang
I’d like to buy a vowel, please. One million of them! I hope Crystal’s kids have time to teach their mom how to spell, because she could use a brush-up.
4. Allowed vs. Aloud
Yes they should, Melissa. Yes. They. Should.
Oh, and Lisa’s update may be one of the craziest things I’ve ever heard. Did the shopping woman chain her stroller to a bike rack or something? With the baby in it?! I’m thinking she just left it there haphazardly, which is prettttyyy horrendous.
5. English Class
Eventually, if you write just poorly enough, someone will call you out on it. It may not be the friendliest way to engage with people on Facebook, but it does get the point across. Proofread your status updates before you post them, because otherwise your friends could wind up making fun of you on your own page. And there’s nothing funny about that.
