STFU Parents: Parents Who Displace Their Pets Because They Have A Baby

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4. Gain A Baby, Lose A Cat


Amanda….I hate to tell you this, but there are thousands—MILLIONS!—of people who have had cats, sometimes even multiple cats, while also having a baby, sometimes multiple babies, and everything worked out just fine. In fact, some people think cat hair and dander help babies develop immunities, so they have a reduced chance of developing allergies and asthma. There have even been studies showing that “babies who grow up in homes with a pet—namely a dog or a cat—are less likely to get sick than children who live pet-free.” But ah, who am I to tell Amanda all of this when she’s probably already done a ton of research herself! She sounds perfectly qualified to make this decision. I’m sure Smokey appreciates the time Amanda is putting in to be a good cat owner.


Damn, L. That’s some perfectly executed shade you’re just threw in C.’s direction. PRO-TIP all you paranoid “momma bears”: There are these things called LINT ROLLERS and WASHING MACHINES that will remove cat hair from your baby’s stuff, IF you choose to ignore that pet hair might actually be great for your baby’s immune system. What you’re doing is the equivalent of lathering up your toddler with hand sanitizer every 20 seconds in the park, blocking your child from germs that may actually have longterm exposure benefits. In other words, you’re being a moron. Do some research. Don’t listen to old wives’ tales or, apparently, your own intuition, because there are a lot of families with pets and babies that cohabit in peace. Pet hair is annoying, but it’s not a good reason to take your cat to the fucking pound. Ugh.

*Side note: I can’t help but notice that several of the examples I receive involve cats that are declawed, which is fucked up. If you’re going to declaw your cat, keep your cat, because otherwise you’re taking away their only means of protecting themselves and basically tossing them to the wild. That’s cruel, and it’s why the rescue group I adopted my two cats through made me sign a contract saying I wouldn’t declaw them. There have been many times that I wished they had no claws, but then I just imagine being a defenseless, 10-pound creature and I’m like, “Nah, it’s cool.” At the very least, if you DO decide to declaw, don’t be an asshole and get rid of the cat a year later.

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