STFU Parents: Moms Who Preach About Eating Their Placenta Can Stop Now

By  | 

1. Are There, Like, Laws And Stuff?

1. illegal placenta

Danielle’s first problem is asking this question on Facebook. Wouldn’t her doctor be a better resource for this type of thing? Although, when you’re essentially talking about a black market for consuming an organ, I suppose the first place one thinks to go is social media. I mean, duh. Except for the fact that the first two people who commented seem a bit skeptical and/or confused, which might not have the been the response Danielle was looking for. I feel confused, too. When is she planning to serve this baby placenta soup? When she’s six months old? Also, let’s all be grateful that it isn’t easy to find ‘placenta soup’ in grocery stores (or even suuuuper artisanal stores in Brooklyn), and it probably never will be. The FDA permits a lot of crazy shit, but placenta-barley soup at Whole Foods isn’t one of them.


2. ‘The Next Best Thing’ (A Rom-Com About Eating Placentas)

2. kjstfuparents

Well, Sherri, you tried. You tried hard. And it turns out that a woman who refers to herself as “Kismit” ain’t buyin’ it. She’s going to get that local, organic, seasonally-flavored sheep’s placenta from New Zeland [sic] and eat the crap out of those sheepy bits. No one can stop her! This is ORGANIC sheep’s placenta, okay? It’s from another country. It’s exotic, and it’s perfectly safe. Don’t tell Kismit what she can and can’t put into her body like some kind of patriarchal government organization designed to keep women down. The hospital totally screwed her on bringing her placenta home in its own wicker carrier, and now she’s doing The Next Best Thing (coming to theaters near you on Thanksgiving). She’s mid-placenta fiasco, and what she really needs during this difficult time is love, sympathy, and sheepy bits.

Pages: 1 2 3 4 5 6