Mommyshame

STFU Parents: Funny Parents On Facebook Are A Holiday Gift To Us All

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3. Homicide-Inducing Christmas Presents

1

Good luck with that, Lindsay! Or, wait, maybe I should say this so you can hear me: GOOD LUCK WITH THAT, LINDSAY!! MY BROTHER HAD A DRUM SET FROM A YOUNG AGE AND MY WHOLE FAMILY WANTED TO DESTROY IT ON A DAILY BASIS, BUT YOU SHOULD BE FINE! THAT AMPLIFIED MICROPHONE ISN’T GOING TO DRIVE YOU TO THE BRINK OF INSANITY AT ALL. YOU’RE TOTALLY GONNA LOVE IT WHEN YOU’RE NOT WEARING YOUR NOISE-CANCELLING HEADPHONES.

2

Only a guy named Charlie could be so reassuring about something so ominous on Christmas. Robin, your choices are as follows: A) Keep the microphone far away from an outlet, or B) Tell your kid that Santa needed it back for repairs, and then never mention it again. Your microphone nightmares are real, and they only get louder with time.

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