Someone Invented a Tampon Speaker So You Can Serenade Your Fetus in the Womb

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Fetus Sucking ThumbWe’d do anything for our babies, but every time we say that someone comes up with a new thing that stretches the definition of “anything.” Would you give up alcohol? Take giant prenatal vitamins? Give up sushi and decently prepared meat? Sure. Now that you’ve done all that, how about you insert a little stereo speaker inside your vagina so you can serenade your fetus with the sounds of your choice.

Someone has actually invented a tiny speaker for pregnant women to insert in their vaginas like a tampon. It is called the BabyPod, it is a tiny speaker that plugs into your iPod, it costs $135, and I literally cannot believe I did not think of this ridiculous idea first.

From the pictures, it does not seem much different from what would happen if you just stuck an ear bud up there to serenade your fetus with Mozart, or Kanye, whatever you like. You could also load them up with language lessons, just to start the pressure as early as possible. The BabyPod website suggests using it from 16 weeks pregnant on, and says, “Babypod gives them their first musical and learning experience.”

But maybe we don’t need babies to have their first musical experiences that early. Drumming on one’s pregnant belly is one thing, but how do we know a fetus even likes it when Mozart comes booming up through the vagina? Maybe what fetuses like best is peace and quiet?

I am totally picturing a tiny, cranky old man fetus floating around in a bubble of amniotic fluid, rapping on the inside of a woman’s abdomen and shouting, “Keep it down out there! I’m trying to sleep in here!”

(Photo: YsaL/iStockPhoto/Getty Images)