being a mom
10 Signs That You’re Being House-Shamed By A Sanctimommy
10. “Oh, look SO tired!”
No shit, Sherlock. It’s 9:30 in the morning, I’m trying to get three kids ready for school and YOU show up with your “real” clothes and your well-caffeinated energy. Of course I look tired. Unless you have a trenta sized black cup of Starbucks magic behind your back, excuse me while I see you OUT.
9. “You look busy…”
They always say this with a questioning tone in their voice, while looking over my shoulder at the pile of unfolded laundry on the couch and the dirty plates on my coffee table as if to say “You look busy…but shouldn’t you be folding those Iron Man undies instead of playing Words With Friends on your phone?”
8. “Maybe you should hire a maid.”
Maybe you should offer to pay for this maid!
7. “What is it you do again?”
I work from home, so this might be more specific to me and other WAHMs. This person hasn’t forgotten what I actually do for a living, she’s just trying to understand why it’s more important than making sure my couch is cat-hair-free. Ya know, Sanctimommy? Because I value paying my damn bills more than keeping my cat’s hair off your dress. Especially when I didn’t invite you over in the first place.
6. “It helps to teach your kids to pick up after themselves.”
You should see the place when they don’t pick up after themselves!
5. “I guess some people just value their space more”
You know what I value more than my space/home/little kingdom (or whatever version of this is being thrown at me)? My sanity. I value a clean home as much as the next gal, but when there’s bills to be paid, boo boos to be kissed and yes, rounds of Words With Friends to be played, sometimes the dishes gotta wait till the morning. Ain’t hurting anything (except your moral indignation).
4. “It must be nice not to care what people think about you!”
It is. It really, truly is. You should try it sometime!
3. “I would come over more if you’d take care of the cat hair situation”
Bwahahaha! My evil plot to keep you away is working! Seriously, is this a threat?
2. “How many kids do you have again?”
Technically? Three. But some days it feels like 30. Actually, most days it feels like 30…
1. “Back in my day things were done differently.”
You mean the “good old days” when abortion was illegal but spousal rape wasn’t?
(Photo:Â PathDoc/Shutterstock/SuperLame.com)