being a mom

Anonymous Mom: My Brother-In-Law Is A Schizophrenic Sex Offender

By  | 

After the hugging incident I decided to look him up and see if he was a registered sex offender. He is. He spent two years in prison for a felony forcible touching crime. He overpowered his victim with his 300 pound body and groped her. Shortly after he was released, he had a psychotic episode and was institutionalized. I would have never expected my S.O. to give me a complete breakdown of every act of violence his James committed before he got his treatment while he was in a psych ward. Now that he is out and he is around my child and I, I feel as if I do have a right to know more about his brother especially since the first thing he spoke of when he arrived at the house were sex acts.

My S.O. of course defended his brother, said he had a psychotic episode and wasn’t really a sexual predator. He also said what his brother did wasn’t that bad. “It’s not like he raped her”, he said. I can’t imagine the horror that woman must have gone through being cornered and groped by a large 300 pound man, I can’t imagine she would shrug the incident off and say “well at least he didn’t rape me”. He also said I can’t share my concerns with his mother. She continues to insist he never did anything wrong and would ultimately blame me if something were to happen.

I don’t believe the mentally ill belong in prisons; if anything prison will only make their condition worse. I am glad he was finally able to get the medication and treatment he needs, kick his drug habit and finally be given the freedom to at least leave the hospital and feel like he can have part of his old life back. However, I can’t shake the fear that I have that something could happen. Should I allow him to corner me in the bathroom and the kitchen, make sexual comments and insist on hugs because I feel sorry for him? Should I put his feelings and his well-being before my own? And most importantly, can I allow my young child to have contact with a registered sex offender just because this person is his uncle and needs his family?

My S.O. doesn’t seem concerned enough about my concerns. I want to move out and he doesn’t seem to be too motivated to find a better paying job and the reason we needed a place to temporarily stay is because of financial issues. I am currently looking for a higher paying job so I can afford to move without my S.O. I feel terrible about this whole situation and I really wish the best for his brother, but I can’t shake the fear that I have living there if he is constantly going to be there.

(Image: Andrea Danti/shutterstock)

Pages: 1 2