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Redditor Posts All His Wife’s Text Messages Over the Span of a Year

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If you’re currently in a relationship, or have been in one over the past decade, you’ve probably sent your significant other a fair number of text messages. These days, it’s all about the texts. We millennials especially seem to dig sending texts way more than making phone calls, and I can’t blame us. Text messages are convenient. They get the point across without having to make small talk. But we can totally also use them for small talk. We can use them for anything. Just check out this redditor’s post detailing his wife’s funny text messages over the span of a year.

Reddit user davidvanbeveren (who was ID’d as David Van Beveren of Portland, Oregon via the Daily Mail) recently decided to make a collage of the many texts he’s gotten from his wife over the past year. Some of them are your standard sort of texts. Some of them are the sort of thing you’d only share or joke about with your significant other (because, well, if you share them with the world, you might get arrested, or at least some major side-eye). Beveren clarifies on Reddit that,  “these texts are in jest, and this is just how we sometimes talk to each-other,” so hopefully y’all get the jokes, or at least understand that many of them are jokes.

Here are a few of my personal favorites:

Reddit / davidvanbeveren

Reddit / davidvanbeveren

Oof. Yes. Girl, I feel that. It’s like every time you drop your pizza on the floor cheese-first. The worst.

Reddit / davidvanbeveren

Reddit / davidvanbeveren

Who hasn’t texted a significant other to rescue them with a paper product? Of course, I think my texts are usually about having forgotten toilet paper while in the bathroom, but you get the jist of it. Also, I’m not sure if her finding paper towels in the backseat is actually part of the same thread or not, but they kinda go together, don’t they?

Reddit / davidvanbeveren

Reddit / davidvanbeveren

This just paints a really interesting visual. Plus who doesn’t love a good astrology reference in their texts?

Reddit / davidvanbeveren

Reddit / davidvanbeveren

Hahahaha this girl has no clue how bad it can be. I do hope if they ever decide to have kids, that they post another one of these to see the evolution of her texts, though. Us mamas know how much in changes up.

Here’s the full text collage for your viewing pleasure (note it’s definitely NSFW):

Reddit / davidvanbeveren

Reddit / davidvanbeveren

Do these sound like the kinds of texts you send? Make a collage yourselves and see what your year was like. Could even be our next article!

(Image: Unsplash / Daria Nepriakhina)