Perez Hilton Launches Family-Oriented Website, Says He’s All Grown Up. Whatevs, Perez

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Perez Hilton – aka Mario Lavandeira – has made a neon-lit name for himself as the king of celebrity dish. The trashy kind (oh, wait, is there any other kind?). In the past, Perez – who’s best known for scribbling penises and cocaine on a good 90 percent of his subjects – has labeled Miley Cyrus a “slut” at age 15, nicknamed a 19-year-old Rumer Willis “Potatohead,” and mocked Suri Cruise for using a binky at age four. And yet he suddenly thinks he’s a parenting expert with the launch of his new website,

“It’s very exciting because it’s just another example of how celebrity news doesn’t need to be negative,” Perez tells Reuters. “People love babies and children and pregnancies.” Um, yeah, they love them so much that advertisers are willing to dish out tons of dough to finance sites like Perez’s, making him one very rich gossip hound. All of this is fine and dandy except for the fact that Perez is mean and, well, not funny. He’s also smart enough to see to pregnancy and babies have never been more “in” when it comes to celebrity culture – so why not profit off of it, right?

I checked out the site and will admit that so far, so tame. It’s actually no different than the countless other celeb sites out there at the moment. But I’m still annoyed. I was annoyed when he penned a children’s book, The Boy With Pink Hair – which, incidentally, has been labeled “gay propaganda” – and I’m annoyed at his latest attempt to pose as some sort of family specialist.

Perez, 33, says he’s “grown up” tremendously over the past year – and certainly since he first started blogging at age 26. He tells Reuters his focus on celebrity families and children comes as a “natural next step” to him and that he considers himself “naturally curious” about the topic. Yeah, right. Sounds more like an attempt to cash in on the public’s obsession with the Mommywood more than anything else.