Everyone Knows That Patrick Stewart Is the REAL Sexiest Man Alive, Including Patrick Stewart

I’m still a little miffed by People Magazine naming Blake Shelton as Sexiest Man Alive. But on the plus side, it’s been a nice few days of being reminded how many beautiful and amazing men walk among us. While there were many, MANY obvious errors with this year’s selection, leaving off Patrick Stewart might be one of the worst. And Patrick, and everyone else, knows it.

Patrick Stewart has been sexy as hell for DECADES. He was sexy while Blake was still toddling around in diapers. He’s CAPTAIN PICARD, for crying out loud!

Image: Giphy

After the announcement, a couple of former Sexiest Men Alive (but still damn sexy) took to Twitter to give Blake a little advice. Because they would know!

I believe that once this title is bestowed upon a man, they’re obligated to change their resume and give this top-billing forever.

See? Ryan gets it. He knows who the real MVP is. But then, THEN, Patrick chimed in with two tickets to the gun show, and whoops where did everyone’s panties go?

The Captain is IN. Even this year’s Sexiest Man Alive* had to bow down to the greatness that is Patrick Stewart.

The thing about Patrick is, he’s not just a beautiful man. He’s a genuinely beautiful soul. Have you seen him with dogs? Or heard him talking about human rights and equality? He is the TOTAL PACKAGE. And lots of people on Twitter were in agreement.



Honestly, a book could be written about the men who’re sexier than Blake Shelton (although props to Blake for knowing he’s in way over his head on this one). And Patrick Stewart would get his very own chapter. We love how everyone is having a good time with this, though. It’s so nice to be able to laugh and have a petty little distraction from all the terrible shit that we read about everyday. I’d rather spend my days googling “sexiest men alive” than read the news, hand down.

(Image: Facebook / Patrick Stewart)

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