OMG, This Baby’s Grandpa Went to Costco and Now She Has a Teddy Bear the Size of a Horse

 

I don’t know about you, but I live in an endless state of fear about grandparent presents. (I realize that as problems go, being afraid of getting too many nice gifts from generous relatives is a very small one.)  My baby’s grandparents live in a huuuuuuuuge house in the Midwest. You know, one of those houses that says, “Fuck it, we live in Indiana and we want to be able to drive ATVs around in our basement.” I, however, have spent my whole life in pretty small, one-bedroom apartments in very large cities, and I live in a state of quiet panic about the day a grandparent shows up with a trampoline. Or a battery-powered toddler car. Or a stuffed animal the size of an Escalade.

Thanks to the power of grandparent generosity and jokes not translating well on the Internet, a five-month-old baby in California is now the proud owner of one of those, and it’s completely hilarious.

According to Refinery29, Sabrina Gonzalez has a five-month-old baby named Maddie and a funny, generous dad who works at Costco. One day the Costco got a shipment of these ridiculously gigantic teddy bears. They’re not just big teddy bears, they are bigger than a grown man. They are bigger than a sofa. They are bigger than a bed. They’re so hilariously gigantic that no one could help take pictures with them, so Gonzalez’ dad did so.

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Sabrina joked back that her five-month-old baby needed one of those big bears, but then a few minutes later her dad messaged her back saying he’d bought one.

“OMG, what!?” she probably said.

(Also, everyone over in the Buzzfeed comments section is a bit obsessed with Maddie’s hot grandpa right now.)

“I couldn’t believe it!” Gonzalez said. But it was true, and now they have a bear that is bigger than a truck, and it’s the cutest thing ever.

Because this is the Internet and we can’t just have nice things, some people got upset about the above photo because they thought it was dangerous to put a baby that high up on the bear. A rudimentary inspection of the “danger” would have revealed a pair of adult hands around the baby’s waist. The bear is just so huge that a whole adult human being is completely hidden beneath it.

Maddie looks really happy about this bear! Sabrina says Maddie adores the giant bear and starts cracking up every time she sees it. That’s pretty much my reaction, too.

If for some reason you need a 93-inch bear of your own, they’re available from Costco online.

Update: Apparently Angelina Jolie has one of these bears, too. Some kids were selling theirs on the street and she pulled over and gave the $100 for it.

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