Suing Your 12-Year-Old Nephew for a ‘Reckless’ Hug Given When He Was 8 Is a Good Way to Never Get Hugged Again By Anyone

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A New York misanthrope who was just too poplar and beloved for her own liking has figured out a very quick way to rectify that situation, and she is suing her 12-year-old nephew for real money over a “reckless” hug he allegedly gave her when he was eight.

According to the New York Daily News, Jennifer Connell, a human resources manager who lives on the Upper East Side of Manhattan, filed a lawsuit against her 12-year-old nephew, Sean Tarala, for $127,000 for allegedly breaking her wrist with an excessively exuberant hug at his eighth birthday party.

According to Connell, four years ago she went to Sean’s birthday party to celebrate his turning eight years old. For whatever reason, the boy apparently loved the heck out of his aunt, so when he saw her he dropped what he was doing and ran into her arms, shouting, “Auntie Jen, I love you!”

Connell maintains that when he hugged her, she fell down and injured her wrist.

”All of a sudden he was there in the air, I had to catch him and we tumbled onto the ground,” Connell testified. ”I remember him shouting, ”˜Auntie Jen I love you,’ and there he was flying at me.”

Connell maintains that life has been difficult for her since breaking her wrist four years ago.

”I was at a party recently and it was difficult to hold my hors d’oeuvres plate,” she said in court, in front of people, while suing a child for hugging her “recklessly.”

If her goal is to make sure nobody attempts to hug or show affection to her again, this seems like a pretty effective way of doing it.

Connell’s suit states that ”a reasonable eight year old under those circumstances would know or should have known that a forceful greeting such as the one delivered by the defendant to the plaintiff could cause the harms and losses suffered by the plaintiff.”

To make matters even worse, Sean’s mother died suddenly just last year. Connell reportedly filed the lawsuit before her death.

Connell sounds like a pretty loathsome human being, and she failed to get a jury to see how her hors d’oeuvre-less future required compensation from the 12-year-old. The jury ruled against her and awarded her nothing.

Also, now every time a potential employer googles her name, this court case is going to come up. Those google search results could not have happened to a nicer lady. (Like, literally. You have to be pretty awful to wind up with “sues grieving child over a hug” in your search results.)