Weird News

The Wheels On This School Bus Go Round And Round, All The Way To HELL

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devilSometimes, a story just reaches out and grabs you. It encloses you in its arms and whispers, “Shh…you know you can’t resist me.” That is what happened this morning when I read a story about a mother who believes that a local school bus is paying homage to the dark lord, Satan.

A slightly hysterical mother in Memphis, Tennessee called her local news station after she saw a school bus with tail lights that she says look like pentagrams. She took a photo and sent it to local WMC Action News, saying, “Anyone who fears a God, if not God and Jesus Christ, should be outraged.”

Indeed. If you’re asking, “What the devil?” then the answer is, “Yes.”

Robin Wilkins, who I imagine is very difficult to make small talk with, is horrified that the Durham Country school district would use a school bus to promote its clearly satanic agenda. She is demanding that the district replace the lights with solid red brake lights. But isn’t red the color of fire, which is found in hell, which is where Satan lives? How are we supposed to protect our children from Satan when there are colors and shapes out there commanding them to commit evil acts?

It’s important to note that pentagrams haven’t been trademarked by Satan, by the way; they do represent other things. For example, the Baha’i, Wiccans, and Latter Day Saints all use pentagrams. There are even pentagrams on the official flags of Morrocco and Ethiopia, and you can’t tell me that they are Satan worshipers because no country that lives in darkness could make food that delicious.

Wilkins argues that, “If you can’t put a cross on there, you cannot put a pentagram on it.” But I would actually love it if Catholic school buses had little crosses on their brake lights. How hard would you laugh if you pulled up behind one of those? It’s like putting your Bible bookmark in a book to save your spot before taking a drink out of your stainless steel Jesus travel mug. Jesus Jesus everywhere and not a drop to drink…or something like that.

The school district has not commented yet, but I like to think that when asked about the controversy, their reaction was this:

“…Sigh.”

(Photo: Twitter via Fox 6 WBRC, @myfoxal)