People Need To Stop Telling Me My Daughter Is Gorgeous — And Doesnâ€™t Look Like Me
My daughterâ€™s looks were a hot topic of conversation from the moment of her birth.Â Â Who did she look like?Â Â The family debated this endlessly.Â Â They never reached consensus.Â Â My mother-in-law insisted that, as a newborn, my daughter looked just like my husband did.Â Â On the other hand, my mother claimed that my daughter was practically a carbon copy of herself at that age.
My daughter didnâ€™t look like me. Yet I was told not to worry as babies change so much from day to day that she would eventually grow to be, if not my spitting image, a stunning amalgam of my husbandâ€™s and my best features. So I waited while breastfeeding and changing diapers hoping for my daughter to morph into a gorgeous version of me.
After the first few months of life my daughter lost the newborn look.Â Â Her eyes stayed blue, though and I hoped that this would be her link to me.Â Â My eyes have always been my best feature, the one that I emphasize with makeup.Â Â I longed to strut down the street with a beautiful daughter peaking out of the top of the carrier and for people to comment on how we made a stunning mother-daughter pair.Â Â Instead people insisted that she didnâ€™t look like me.
It irked me that nobody remarked a similarity between my daughter and myself however everyone told me to wait and that her face would change with each passing day.Â Â Meanwhile my mother and mother-in-law became engaged in a catty competition about which grandmother my daughter most closely resembled.
Itâ€™s worth mentioning that I gave birth to my daughter in May 2006, right after Katie Holmes had Suri and just before Angelina Jolie hadÂ Shiloh.Â Â Pregnancy and newborns were the new fashion.Â Â As an expecting mother I had basked in attention from friends, family and complete strangers inÂ New York City.Â Â Everyone told me that I was destined to have a beautiful daughter — beautiful like her mother.
I should admit that I have always loved being the focus of attention and getting complimented on my appearance and that I have a tendency to become jealous when others steal my spotlight.Â Â After a few months of constantly being told how beautiful my daughter was without hearing any kind words directly pertaining to me, I became somewhat peeved.
Then, one day, when my daughter was a little over one year old something maddening happened.Â Â It was a lovely May morning and I had decided to take my daughter out for a stroll inÂ ProspectÂ Park.