Body Image

There’s Nothing In The Mom Contract That Requires You To Wear A Swimsuit

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Secondly, unless you make a big deal about saying so, your kids won’t have any idea that you avoid wearing a bathing suit because you feel unattractive in it. I don’t do a ton of swimming with my kids and that is because my husband happens to love it and I can take it or leave it. If he takes them into the water, it gives me time to sit on the beach and read. Everyone’s happy. They do ask me to swim sometimes and I occasionally oblige, but they don’t seem to think anything of it when I bow out. Like the mom writing to Prudence, I too do activities with my kids that their father does not ever participate in. I see nothing wrong with this.

Prudence agreed with me and told this mom that she does not need to make herself feel uncomfortable for anyone’s sake:

Rock the T-shirt and sweats, Mom. You are not a swimming fan and you are particularly not a swimsuit fan—is anyone except the people who appear in the Sports Illustrated swimsuit issue or the people who buy the swimsuit issue? Is your husband hassling you because he doesn’t want to do pool duty? Too bad. I agree that even if you looked like SI model Gigi Hadid, you’d have a right to say, “I don’t do swim time. That’s for you, dear.”

Right on. Why should this woman put herself in a position of feeling incredibly awkward for the sake of anyone else, even her kids? Whether she wants to reveal her body is her business alone. Unless she makes a big show of saying she feels self-conscious and the reasons why, her kids won’t know. There are so many other ways we can make memories with our kids that involve being fully-clothed. No mom (or dad) should ever feel they have to parade around the community pool in a bathing suit in order to be a good parent. Our self-confidence is worth just as much as our children’s happiness.

(Image: /Shutterstock)

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