The Mommy Wars
Mom Blogger Wants Mom Bloggers To Stop Writing About Mom Blog Stuff
I’m going to make a statement that’s not going to be very popular with some, but here goes: there are no original ideas in Mom Blogging. Sorry. It’s true. I don’t mean to burst the bubble of those who think they invented the wheel — wait, never mind. Yes I do.
Today I read a post on Mamapedia in which a mom blogger described all of the things she’s sick of seeing on mom blogs. In a nutshell she says she’s already written about all of these topics so everyone should just stop now, mkay? Here’s how it starts:
I am the first to admit that Iâ€™m now considered a village elder as far as motherhood is concerned. Been there, done that, drank the vodka, if you know what I mean. Like I always remind my darling 14 year old William (the last of my four kids):Â â€œDude, donâ€™t even try to shock me anymore. I have seen it all.â€
She’s been through the early stages of parenting and she doesn’t want to hear about it anymore. Just stop, moms. Seriously. You’re annoying this woman. Here are the five things she would like the parental blogosphere to stop covering immediately:
“1. Earnest, vaguely hipsterish Stay At Home Dads reminding us of how awesome they are.”
“Yes, theyâ€™re great. But so are the dads who are out working their asses off to provide for their families. Hell, in my humble opinion, just being a contributing father, whether you provide income or care or both, makes you a great dad.”
Did you hear that dads! Why bother turning gender stereotypes on their asses and contributing to discussions about parenting in a very real way? This woman is sick of it. Just stop.
“2.Â Bitching about not being able to use the bathroom in peace.”
“I kind of understand this one, up to a point. I was in that boat for a long time, where showers were done furtively and quickly, with constant peeks out of the shower curtain to make sure the baby in the car seat hadnâ€™t choked or fallen out. And I have experience in sitting on the toilet, doing my business, while breastfeeding (who knew that learning how to wipe with a baby on my lap would be great training for Future Me and my lovely panniculus? Google it, I canâ€™t be bothered to provide an explanation right now. Three c-sections, bitches!)”
Uh, you just told an anecdote about how hard it is to pee alone, whilst complaining about moms talking about how hard it is to pee alone. Impressive.
“3. Vagina talk, and the endless euphemisms for the word ‘vagina’.”
“Yes, I knowâ€¦I wrote an award-winning (LOL) post about this subject. But that was two years ago and it was already getting old (the subject, and also my vaginaâ€¦ba dum BUM).”
Haha – WUT? Vaginas are hilarious. We’re not going to stop writing about them. No way, no how.