Mommyish Death Match: Would You Boycott A Restaurant Forever If There Was Semen Found In Their Food?

By  | 

fast food semen hoaxI think at some point we’ve all been suckered into an internet hoax, and I am no different. I love a good food horror story, which is why I furiously clicked on the link that promised: Health Department Confirmed Semen Found On McDonald’s Mayonnaise.

Of course, a few minutes into actually being on the All Singapore Stuff (or ASS) website, it doesn’t take long to figure out that this is a fake story. Yes, a quick Googling will turn up just how fake it actually is, but you don’t even need to make the effort with quotes like these:

“She was halfway through with her sandwich when she noticed a clump of mayonnaise on the side of her bun. She licked it off, but when she tasted it she immediately realized things were not right. ‘I’m not gonna lie,’ McDowell said. ‘On Birthdays and holidays I give my man a little something extra in the bedroom, you know? So when I licked the mayo off of the bun, the texture was familiar.'”


Eating at McDonald’s is one of those things that you know you shouldn’t do, but you probably do it anyway because it’s quick, easy, and tastes okay for a few minutes before turning you into a sweaty, shaking pile of regret.

I like to pretend that I don’t eat at McDonald’s, but I do because they are one of the few places that does not judge me if I ask for a child-sized meal. A lot of people eat at McDonald’s, and we eat it despite the fact that we know there is questionable crap all in it. So would semen be different? If your sandwich had a little man mayonnaise on it, would you finally put it down? Or would you continue to eat at places like McDonald’s even if there was a confirmed instance of “Essence of Fry Cook” on the “food”?

If you think this is a crazy person question, then you should know that there are lots of people out there who love McD’s so much they would eat there no matter what:

So, what say you? The old semen in the fast food hoax is one of the oldest in the book, but if it were real would that be the end of fast food for you?

[poll id=”53″]

(Image: tsarov/Shutterstock)