Let’s Kick All Unruly Passengers Off Of Planes. Preferably In Mid-Flight.

I’m reading the latest press release from Camila Grey and Leisha Hailey, the women who were escorted off a plane after their make-out session on a recent Southwest Airlines flight. And while there’s no way of knowing, at this point, whether the ladies in question didn’t respond well to requests to take it down a notch or Southwest overreacted to smoochy time, I am all for escorting more people off of planes.

Families who don’t even try to quiet their children, for instance. Loud drunks. People with body odor more fitting a rabid weasel than a traveler. My fantasy list for escorting passengers off a plane (preferably in mid-flight!) is a mile high. Or long. Whatever.

But the case does raise interesting questions about how to parent when confronted with public displays of affection that might be more suitable for the bedroom than, say, the grocery store, airplane or DMV. I always thought the sight of tongue during public kissing was gauche but now that I have children, I care more about it.

And not just public sex but just public decency in general. I took my girls to a baseball game on Sunday and kept overhearing drunk frat boys in our section belching and dropping F-bombs. I gave them the look of “Hey! Kids right here in front of you, dude!” but subtlety doesn’t even work on sober college kids, half the time.

My kids are pretty young right now but pretty soon this will be an issue. I suppose I’ll handle it with my traditional, “Other people choose to grab each other’s crotch and scream at people who ask them to “get a room!” but that’s not how we do things when we’re flying the friendly skies.”

Still, it would be nice if people thought a moment before using vulgar language around children, engaging in public displays of too much affection or even just being rude.