Childrearing

Let’s All Clutch Our Pearls Over the Naughty Boob Puns on These Teenagers’ T-Shirts

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(Photo: Beetween) 

Everyone prepare to clutch your pearls, because a store is selling T-shirts with puns on them, and some mothers are shocked, outraged, and appalled.

A Staten Island “boutique” by the name of Bee Tween is selling an orange Halloween shirt that has two bees in ghost costumes over the “breastal region.” In case the joke was not immediately clear, the shirt says: “Boo Bees.”

According to the New York Post, some area parents have gotten all fired up about how inappropriate the shirt is for adolescents and teenagers.

I am just as scandalized, but only because that shirt costs $50.

“I’m disgusted,” said one woman who identified herself only as a mother of three. “It’s fine if some adult bimbo wants to wear it — but a young impressionable girl? It’s insulting as a woman and a mother. We don’t need clothing like that out there influencing impressionable young minds.”

I would argue with her that any “young, impressionable girl” who wore this shirt certainly got the joke before putting it on and thus was not having her impressionable mind influenced by anything, but I was definitely the kind of innocent teenager who would have worn that T-shirt for days, probably gotten suspended, and never once figured out the pun. (I am bad with stuff like that. I once spent a whole gaming convention wearing a T-shirt that said “I have wood for sheep,” and did not realize it sounded sexual until three days into the event. I thought it was just a game reference.)

As bad at puns as I was, I think we can assume that any teenager who wears this shirt is doing so on purpose. And really, it’s not that big of a deal. If a parent thinks it is inappropriate for his or her daughter, then that is a conversation to be had with that teenager. It is not appropriate to have something yanked off the shelves because one parent thinks it’s tacky.

The parents who are upset about the shirts are unlikely to effect any change, however, because they won’t even give their names. The owner of Bee Tween is Janine Detore, the sister of “Big Ang” Raiola from Mob Wives. I guess they figure boob puns and impressionable tween minds are not worth bothering the mob about.

Detore, however, is defending her shirt in completely the wrong way by insisting that there is no pun going on at all. These are just bees dressed as ghosts for Halloween. It’s totally innocent. It’s not supposed to sound like “boobies” at all.

“The boo stands for the costume, they’re ghosts,” she said. “The bees not only stands for actual bees, but we call our clients bees because they are bee-tween, just turning into a teenager and up.”

Oh please. Anybody innocent enough to believe that one probably was too innocent to notice the pun in the first place.