Kate Middleton’s Premature Birthing Plan Involves A Helicopter Ride

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Kate Middleton attends a Princess Cruises ship naming ceremony at Ocean TerminalIf you were like me and thought that Kate Middleton‘s birthing plan seemed a little complicated, then let me introduce you to Kate’s premature birthing plan. If the Duchess pulls a Kim Kardashian and goes into labor early, there’s a helicopter ride in it for her! Wheee!

Us Weekly reports that a preemie baby means a helicopter ride for Kate, according to one of two reported Buckingham Palace birthing plans:

Should Middleton go into labor early, a helicopter will fly her 70 minutes away to London’s St. Mary’s Hospital. Once checked in, she hopes to give birth naturally, according to a source. However, should she run into delivery complications, an insider says “she will have a C-section.”

From there, we then slide right into the protocol that was already announced in birthing plan one:

The royal baby’s birth will be announced via a bulletin on an easel behind the gates of Buckingham Palace announcing, “Her Royal Highness the Duchess of Cambridge was safely delivered of a child.” According to a palace aide, “There will be gun salutes, flag flying and bell pealing. It’s very exciting.”

A “palace aide” also says that the new parents “will pose with the baby for pictures” upon leaving the hospital. Just what a freshly postpartum lady needs! And you thought your “I just birthed this baby” hospital photographs weren’t exactly Facebook-worthy. Is there going to be a makeup artist/hair team/Tracy Anderson on that helicopter too?