People Are Getting Pissy That Kate Middleton’s Baby Bump Isn’t Exploding Out Of Her Coat

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Kate Middleton Baby BumpFrom the moment Kate Middleton had her big fancy Princess wedding in April 2011, the hunt has been on for that royal baby bump. So much so that when the Duchess was not pregnant mere months after her wedding, tabloids started spinning that old infertility narrative. But now that Kate Middleton is officially expecting, some are still wondering where their big Kate Middleton baby bump is. As if they’re entitled to it.

Daily Mail reports that Kate Middleton was out and about in “a slim-fitting Hobbs coat.” But what has them in a tizzy is that the Duchess previously wore that coat in 2012.  Oh dear, it’s not a special maternity wear coat? Why is she able to belt it? And the bump speculation continues:

Today, despite being almost six months pregnant, the duchess looked almost as slender as she did when she first wore the coat on a Valentine’s Day visit to Liverpool, her tiny bump barely visible beneath the narrow belt encircling her midriff…The only difference between today’s styling and that of 2012 was in the positioning of the belt. Today it was a fraction higher than it was last year, and the fabric was gently filled out by Kate’s neat bump.

A fraction higher, you say? No doubt, someone is measuring this nonsense.

Personally, I want up to the minute updates on the exact placement of Kate’s belts. I want a ticker with live updates on her every rounding clavicle and the exact amount of weight that she is gaining in her elbows, perhaps to be blasted out via a @KateMiddletonPregnancyUpdates Twitter feed.

I guess that “neat bump” will have to tide the public over until the silly mommyrexia narrative starts.