being a mom

10 Things I Did Not Believe Until I Became A Mom

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I know that in my pregnant reverie, I hated nothing more than experienced moms “telling me how it is” and raining on my parade. I also became convinced that so many of them were trumping up how difficult certain parts of parenthood were and thought that they either sucked at being a mom or were lying to torture me in my innocence. Boy, did I get mine when I discovered that nearly everything they told me was true and possibly, in some instances, downplayed. Without a doubt, there are many things about parenting that I did not believe until I became a mom:

1. Just How Little Sleep You Will Get

Our first baby was a good sleeper but even that one nightly feeding was tough for me because I do not fall back to sleep easily. My second child made me truly realize just how little sleep a person can survive on. It was worse than all of the nightmare tales I had been told combined.

2. That Finding Time To Shower Is Hard

Now, I always DID find time to shower because I’m worth it, dammit, but there were days where it was not easy. When my little guy wanted nothing more than to be held but I smelled like a garden salad and needed a scrub, I would have to listen to a solid eight minutes of him in the bouncy seat shrieking like I was pouring acid on his face. Some days, that sacrifice was not worth it and I would just wait until my husband got home to shower. Me- 3, Baby- 4823.

3. The Suckiness Of Kiddie TV Shows

Caillou, Dora, Mickey Mouse and the rest can truly suck it. Moms are right- kiddie TV is truly the worst. I have found very few shows over the years that don’t make me want to run out my front door screaming and now that my kids are older, it’s getting worse. “Jessie”, anyone?

4. How Often You Will Eat Your Food Cold

This one was tough to concede to because it was my sister-in-law saying it and she was SUCH a damn know-it-all and I wanted so badly to prove her wrong. In the end, my husband and I found that eating in shifts was a great way to avoid this pitfall but on certain days, you simply give no shits and eat that cold mac and cheese anyway.

5. How Often You Will Play Referee To Your Kids

I lied- this one came from my sister-in-law too. She has three boys and would lose her damn mind if we bought them different things for holidays because they would fight over it. She would beg us to buy them all the same thing and I would roll my eyes for days so, SIL- I get it now. You win. My kids only ever get the same color lolli-pop and the same size piece of cake because I quite simply cannot even with breaking up the stupid fights.

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