I Am Jealous Of My Kids’ Relationship With Each Other
I grew up with two younger brothers. We got along well for the most part and loved each other- I would say we were close. We liked to play video games, watch TV and run around outside together but we also enjoyed our individual pursuits. We would all retreat to our own space often and read, talk on the phone to a friend, whatever. My point is, we were not attached at the hip and did not consider each other BFF at the time. Our relationship was good looking back from my adult perspective but now that I see my own children, I feel like I got a raw deal. In the absolute best way possible, I am jealous of my kids’ relationship with each other.
My daughter was 20 months old when our son was born. I would say that a month after he was born, she probably didn’t remember her life before him. All she knew was that he was her brother and her buddy- from the time he could notice her and interact with her, they were each other’s favorite companion. See below- he was about three months old here and this perfectly sums up their relationship:
No one could make him happy the way she could and vice versa. They share this amazing bond that my husband and I will never be able to understand. On the first day of kindergarten, my son separated from me at daycare drop-off with no issue- he was all smiles. I was shocked because he is very sensitive and also, very nervous of new situations. I found out later that his breakdown only happened when his sister left him at his kindergarten classroom. Leaving her is so much more traumatic for him than leaving us. She is his comfort and he is her favorite person, the one who makes her laugh and challenges her to play characters during Pretend that she might not normally be comfortable with. They play off each other beautifully and fill in where the other lacks.
To say that I am jealous sounds like I begrudge them their relationship, which is not true. I just wish I had that bond with anyone in my life. I love my husband so much but he has not been around since day one- he has not seen me grow up and experienced life with me all along. I have realized recently what an incredible gift my kids are to each other- they will always have that. The fact that they have been there for each other from the start.
Now that they are older, it seems like their friendship strengthens every day. They commiserate with each other when they think my husband and I can’t hear them- about school, about how Mommy and Daddy won’t allow this or that- they truly are partners and it is the cutest thing ever. It is my hope that their relationship continues this way and that they don’t grow apart but if they do, I know that the friendship they have right now is making their childhood so much better. I am not sure my husband and I did anything to foster it but if we did, I will consider their love for each other to be our greatest success as parents so far. I love you, little guys- and I am so thankful for how much you love each other.
(Image: Warren Goldswain/Shutterstock)