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40 Utterly Hilarious Tweets About Marriage

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Oh, spouses can be such jokesters.

HAHAHAHA, that would be so funny! Oh man, what a laugh you’ll get from that! A story to share with the grandkids, for sure. If you make it that long, that is. Nothing, and we mean nothing, will threaten your life like waking your sleeping wife. Unless something is on fire, someone is bleeding, or you just brought home her favorite food for no good reason, DO NOT WAKE YOUR SLEEPING WIFE. She’ll forgive the kids for blowing an air horn next to her while she’s asleep. She will find a new spouse shortly after your funeral and live high on the hog on insurance money if you do it.

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