How To Help Your Child With Their Homework Without Losing Your Mind

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father-helping-son-with-homeworkHomework is the bane of my existence. As a kid I loved it, but as a parent with a kid who most certainly does not love it, I dread the hour after school that’s been set aside for homework in our house. There are only so many times that you can answer the question “But WHY do I have to circle all of the stupid odd numbers in the number search?” before you start contemplating terrible things.

However, here I stand, my mind relatively intact, ready to drop some wisdom bombs on how to stay sane while explaining the difference between long vowels and short vowels.

Step One: 3:00 is not too early to drink

Start out light, of course. A pale ale, maybe a simple chardonnay. Whatever. Pour a glass. You will need it. Pace yourself.

Step Two: Hold your breath and reach into the cavern of horrors

Also known as your child’s book bag. Try not to freak out if something sticks to your hand. Pull out homework folder/binder/notebook.

Step Three: Determine what needs to be done. Spoiler: A lot.

I might be remembering wrong, but I don’t think I had this much homework in elementary school. Whatever. Make a few piles: reading homework, math homework, social studies. Mourn the death of thousands of trees who gave their lives only to be reincarnated as a worksheet that will inevitably end up in the trash.

Step Four: Time to get started!

Have your kid pick a starting point. Which they will presumably get immediately underway. Right after this glass of water. And this potty break. And this quick snack. And also this pencil needs to be sharpened. A lot.

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